Guilty Pleasures~ Ten On Tuesday!!

"Short is the joy that guilty pleasure brings." ~ Euripides

"Pleasure is the greatest incentive to evil." ~ Plato

"Every man is guilty of all the good he did not do." ~ Voltaire




Ten On Tuesday asks us today to name ten of our guilty pleasures.. I personally have more than ten to choose from.. I could most likely give a lot more than ten if I needed to.. Thankfully they only asked for ten so some of my secrets will still be safe.....

A guilty pleasure is something one considers pleasurable despite feeling guilt for enjoying it..Often, the "guilt" involved is simply fear of others discovering you're lowest obsession or embarrassing tastes, rather than actual moral guilt....Fashion... music... reading material.. and food.. are all examples of guilty pleasures...

1-}~ Chocolate.. I love it.. especially dark chocolate or chocolate covered cherries.. chocolate covered orange slices are fine indeed.. brownies.. chocolate pie.. chocolate cake..chocolate! YES!!

2-}~ Coffee.. I can drink it from sun up to sun down and have even been known to take a cup with me to bed..lucky for me it doesn't keep me awake..

3-}~ Home baked bread.. with REAL BUTTER!.. yes I am aware that it is fattening.. but it's too late for me to worry about that.. if I am going to the trouble to bake bread.. I want real butter.. (and yes it is a lot of trouble to use a bread machine!..)

4-}~ Tequila.. OK you don't have to drink any.. that means there is more for me.. salt and lime would be nice but I can drink it without.. Now before anyone gets all in a snit..and thinks me to be a drunkard.. I love it but haven't had any tequila in about a year.. but if you were running out to buy me some.. get the good kind please!..

5-}~ Birds singing in my greenhouse room.. yes they are caged.. they have adequate water and food.. they are babied and petted and have extra large cages... all but one of them has a mate..the room is glassed in all around and filled with plants.. they sing constantly so I am assuming they are happy.. they even have baths where they splash and play in the afternoon sun... but yes.. they are caged...

6-}~ Old fashion dolls... Barbie and before Barbie and after Barbie.. Barbie's friends.. naked dolls and dressed dolls and yard sale dolls and flea market ladies.. I really love the 18 inch versions of old fashion dolls.. I will take any that are in your way.. I love dolls.. My wonderful husband usually gets me at least one for Christmas as do some of my children.. Yes.. I am too old for dolls.. but I do enjoy sewing and crocheting them clothes..and I do of course need one of every kind for a pattern design model.. Do you have a kind that I don't have????

7-}~ Donny Osmond albums... I have a few.. I want some more of those too.. I have an old record player that still plays.... I used to share this great music with the kids in my life until they said it sucked.. after that I just played it every single day of the long long summer for spite... I listened to some of them a few nights ago while Dave and I were finishing up the bedroom we remodeled..
it doesn't have a television.. it has instead our albums and my very old record player....

8-}~ Ice cream.. I love ice cream..don't even go there with the fattening thing again.. I've already said it was too late for that.. I love the kind that has a lot of STUFF in it.. like cherries and chocolate and stuff!.. I'll eat any kind except for butter pecan.. I like pecans and I like butter but not in my ice cream..

9-}~ Leggings with a long t-shirt.. I am well aware that those are for "young" people.. I have been told that they are out of style.. Of course everything about me is out of style.. I still have a few pair and sometimes I sleep in them.. sometimes I wear them all day and cut the grass wearing them and feed chickens wearing them.. I cook and clean wearing them too... Dave doesn't mind if I'm out of style.. sometimes I even wear them with my old Indian moccasins... maybe I'll wear that outfit the next time I come to a family gathering... at your house...NAH I wouldn't do you that way.. scared you though didn't I?

10-}~Video games.. Roll playing games in particular.. I love games that allow me the chance .. for a little while.. to be someone else.. I play all the facebook games..I love the Sims games... I have played nearly every roll playing game to be offered for free on-line.. I have been a farmer and an island castaway...A mafia king pin and a chef in a fine restaurant.. I have played all of the Final Fantasy games and worn out two PlayStation-2 consoles on roll playing games... I can be someone else for a little while.. I can even be an alien.. then with the flip of a switch.. I am still me... in my out of style leggings... in my old house.. with my cup of black coffee.. and my caged birds cooing and singing.. chickens crowing and Old records playing.. And in the end.. I like me well enough!! Have a great night!
Patsy

The Worse Date of my life!

"A man on a date wonders if he'll get lucky. The woman already knows."
~ Monica Piper~



"I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog." ~ Wendy Leibman~



The shrilling ring of the phone began as soon as the bedroom door closed behind me. I glanced back at the door thinking that if that phone woke up my babies someone was going to die tonight. Emily was back in her bubble like tent after another bout with Asthma and Cooper had not wanted to sleep without her. He had demanded I sing Cum Ba Ya for at least five hundred verses. He loved that song. He loved the someones working and someones crying verses but he loved the someone is singing verse most of all. He would sing with his small voice for hours when he didn't want to go to sleep. " Some one is singing Lord Cum Ba Ya!" Over and over we had sung till finally he had give up and went to sleep. Now it was after ten o'clock and I was plum wore out. Anthony was gone for the summer to work in watermelons at my sisters so I was handling the little ones all alone. We had been today for a cancer treatment for Emily. Cooper was cranky. We Both were cranky. I snatched the phone off the hook ending the ring and as quietly as I could I said Hello.


"Hey Girl, What ya doing?" It was Tracy, a girl I knew from a store close to where I lived before I moved here. Before the divorce. Before the world started making me mad. She was just a person I knew Not someone I would have expected to call me. "I got your number from your Brother-in-law" she said, "he was just in here a while ago. I tried to call you but you didn't answer." I began to explain that It had been a rough day and I had been getting the kids down.

"Oh I don't care about all that." she said, "I have a guy for you to meet. You need to go right now to Harry's and he is...."
"Hold On" I said. " who is this Guy?" She had the whole thing planned out for me.. He was someone I didn't know But he was right now waiting for me to show up at a local bar. I would know him she said by who he was with. He was with her own Husband right now.. I had to go there right now..He wanted to meet me right now..


There were so many things I felt like I needed to know before I loaded up to go meet a stranger in a bar. Not to mention that now was really not a good time.I was tired. I had just got the babies to sleep and what was I supposed to do with them while I traipsed around to a bar this late at night? She had all that worked out too. I was to load them up and take them to my sisters house. she had already asked Trudy and Trudy had told her she would watch them. I asked how old he was and she swore he was our age. There were really a lot of things that didn't suit me about this date but they talked me into it. They brushed aside all my complaints.Trudy was waiting on the sleeping kids and Tracy was going to come to the Bar just as soon as she could get there.. Hurry they said he is waiting and he's nice and on and on. Giving the bedroom door one more glance and saying a silent prayer that I would not regret this I hurried to the shower. It was by Now eleven pm and I still had to drive the babies to my sisters house, But I wasn't going to meet a man in the clothes I had worn all day.. I still had some pride after all.


I walked into the bar at eleven thirty seven.And looked around for John. He was Tracy's husband and Was supposed to be with the man of my dreams. Well at least Tracy's dreams for me. I spotted John near the back of the bar in a booth and headed that way. I had never been in that bar before and was surprised to see a lot of people I knew. A lot of People I saw had went to High school with me. I was stopped a few times before I reached the table. I had dressed in a pair of jeans and a tank top with a white long sleeved shirt open over that. I wasn't vain but I knew I looked pretty good for a woman thirty two years old. I looked pretty good for a Mom of three. I hadn't started dating yet. This would have been my first date. I didn't like the way it had happened but I was still hopeful. I walked up to the table where the two men sat with a little hope in my heart. My instinct had warned me.. But I was here now. I was ready for this date.


John was sitting across from a very nice looking young man. He didn't look my age. He looked much younger than me. John was my age. But John was also much older than Tracy. Maybe she had meant he was her age. They both had their legs stretched out across the bench on the side they were sitting on I stood at the end of the booth and waited for them to offer me a seat. I said Hi and reached to shake his hand saying " You Must be Mike?" He nodded then waved for the waitress to come over. " Yea " he said " I'm Mike" He and John both ordered beer. I wanted a coke but no one offered me a drink. They still hadn't offered me a seat. I was beginning to get a head ache from the loud music and all the smoke. I was also getting angry that not only was he way younger than me But he was rude as well. I wondered what Tracy had been thinking. Where was she any way? I knew the store was already closed. I was about to just walk out when a guy who went to school with me, came over and asked me to dance. His wife was already on the floor and the song was rather slow. I figured I might as well get something for my trouble so I walked away and left the two of them still laughing and talking together. They didn't even appear to miss me when I looked back from the dance floor. I knew this was a bad idea. I told my dance partner. He laughed and asked me where my ex was. He was shocked that I was divorced. I was shocked when he pulled me closer to his body after learning I was single after an eighteen year marriage.


Finally the dance was over and I had just walked away from the second man in one night. I felt as if this must be some crazy nightmare. I even for a second thought maybe I was asleep on the bed beside Cooper having sung myself to sleep right along with him and Em.I pinched myself to make sure. I really was in a bar in the middle of the night and My kids really were with Trudy. I felt stupid. I went to the bar and asked if they had coffee. The female bartender laughed at me and said I could get a cup at the store next door. I thanked her and was about to leave when John waved me over again and shouted my name. I went over again and this time I asked if I could sit down. Mike moved his legs and allowed me to sit by him. He was extremely tall and had the greenest eyes I believe I had even seen. He truly was very nice looking. But I was mad now. I had no intention of being nice at this point. He was way to young. He hadn't bought me a coke. I was way to tired for this whole thing.


"Look, I have to go." I said as I reached for a napkin. I asked John to borrow the pen I could see in his shirt pocket and wrote my number on the napkin. " "Mike, I'm not sure we should date, But call me tomorrow if you still want to go out and we will set something up between us." I said handing John his pen and Mike the folded napkin. I was going home. My head was pounding and my heart was not. I had made a mistake. " Hey Patsy" he said as I started to walk away, " how old is your baby?" I stopped and looked at him wondering if he had really said Baby. Not children or even Kids. He said Baby as if I only had one lone child. I was going to kill Tracy if I even saw her again. I explained that I had three children. He nodded when I said Emily was two years old. He even nodded when I said Cooper was four years old. I have to give the young man credit that he didn't faint when I said that Anthony was fourteen years old. But what he said scared me to death. He said. " Wow, he's only six years younger than me. I bet me and him will be friends." I tried to smile but couldn't I was suddenly feeling sick. I ran from the bar and all the way to my car. I got in and locked the door then sat there and cried. I wasn't supposed to be at a bar meeting a man who was twelve years younger than me. I wasn't supposed to be out in the middle of the night with my kids at my sisters house. I wasn't supposed to be a single mom at all. Then I heard the knocking on my window.


I didn't know the man outside the glass. He was standing there holding a steaming cup of coffee and smiling at me as if we were old friends. I rolled the window down and he handed me the coffee.. "Here" he said, "I see you are new at this dating thing." I nodded as I tried to wipe the tears away. He assured me it got better and that I would find a lot had changed since I had been out there in the world. He reminded me to be careful. Then he laughed and said I shouldn't accept drinks, even coffee from strangers. I felt better as I drove to My sister's house and got my kids.


Emily never knew she had been on a midnight ride that turned into the worse date of my life. Cooper woke up as I carried him back to his bed and demanded that I sing again. I was glad to sing him a few verses as he fought to stay awake for only a few minutes before he gave a great sigh and curled into a sleeping ball. I closed their door for the second time and headed off to bed myself. I was glad I had gone even though it hadn't been a good idea. I had learned something tonight. I had learned that people mean well but that I might better hunt my own dates from now on. I also learned that I would be treated different since I was a divorced woman. I also decided that I was worthy of the best life had to offer and that I wouldn't settle for less than the best.


I never saw the coffee bearing stranger again. I asked about him in the bar but no one could remember having ever seen him. I did see Mike one more time when he came by my house one night UN-invited and drunk, hoping for, as he called it, a little older woman fun. I explained to him that he was way too young for me and that he needed a girl his age. I forgave him for being not what I was looking for. He was just a kid compared to me. I hope life is treating him good now. Tracy and John divorced a few years after that. I think life is treating her good. He's still being himself. Still hanging in the same bar. I never did date anyone from the bar. I only dated two men after the divorce. The second one was my prince charming. He and I have been married what seems like a life time. I didn't settle. I got the best.


Never trust someone Else's word when it comes to a date with a stranger. If something feels wrong it most likely is. And remember that Our age only works if you and she are really the same age! Laugh at me.. I know you are. I am too. I wouldn't change my life but God knows I wouldn't live it over.. especially that date! The worse date of my life! Have a great day!
Patsy

The Invisible Man

No one is asking what happened to all the homeless. No one cares, because it's easier to get on the subway and not be accosted. ~Richard Linklater

I would do anything for my Mother. That is how I became aware of the invisible man. Last July Mama got sick. Now Mama hates hospitals almost as much as I do and had never been admitted to one except for the times she was there to have babies. She doesn't count those eight times. This time though Mama wasn't going to come home with a bundle of joy. I wasn't sure Mama was going to come home at all. But for now she and her sick heart were upstairs under the attention of her other seven children and her first Non baby toting nurse. I was leaning against the ashtray outside. I was trying to get me a few more puffs in before I had to return to the sterile heart ward to guard my Mother through the night.

I watched him walk past me and then come back and ask for a light. I shared my lighter and small talk as he lit a half smoked cool and propped up there beside me near the ashtray stands. He wore jeans slung low on a skinny butt. Much too thin for my taste even had I been in the market for a man. His hair could have used a trim but wasn't unfashionably long. It appeared clean. He had a tattered gray backpack hanging from one Bony shoulder. His green eyes smiled as he stood laughing as I related to this stranger how the ambulance driver had scared me on the sixty mile ride from My Tiny town to this bigger, better equipped for sick people, City. He agreed that they could be scary behind the wheel. I was sure he was a Doctor or at the very least a medical student. He wished me luck as I turned to go back inside. I did look back once as I walked away. He was tucking something into the side pocket of his Backpack.

Morning finally came peaking through the clouds.. A light rain was falling as My sisters came quietly into the room. They were glad to take over the guarding of our mama and allow me to get some coffee and a smoke. I rode the elevator to the lobby amazed at the early morning bustle of the large City Hospital. Our own tiny hospital only a forth the size, if that, of the one where they had sent my Mama. Congestive heart failure meant Mama had to be moved. And I knew Mama wouldn't go alone. So I had come with her. I would do anything for my mama..She would do anything for me.

I followed my nose to the coffee shop once I reached the ground floor. Just as I went in I saw my stranger friend from the night before cut across the lobby. He was again carrying his back pack. On the way to learn more about Doctoring I thought Watching him hurry to catch the elevator.

I was glad to see others near the ashtrays this morning. I like people in general and like to listen as other people talk to each other. Some call me nosy. I just think I'm curious. I had found me a spot on a ledge near the stands and was enjoying the vacation planning of a couple near me when I first heard the angry yell. "Who took my coffee?' the man yelled looking around at the rest of us. No One answered as he continued to look around for his missing cup. I looked around too, now fully alert and on the look out for a thief with a coffee cup. I only saw the young man from last night as he turned the corner heading away from the pack of early smokers. Just as he turned his profile was turned to me and I saw him drinking from a large coffee. He almost seemed to be laughing as he hurried away into the parking garage. Something about him stuck with me as I walked back to the elevator. I didn't know what yet but I was nosy. I would figure it out.

The rains came hard and fast that afternoon as Mama slept a drugged sleep. I decided a cup of soup from the cafeteria would sooth me. As I walked down the hall towards the elevator I caught a glimpse of the young man again. He was hurrying away from the trash can; Near the snack machines in the Lobby; right beside the nurses station. He had His back pack off and was stuffing it with packages half full of crackers and some sandwiches that they had taken out of the machine earlier that day. Out of date food and two past their prime apples. It was then that I realized that the man I had thought was a doctor was Homeless. It broke my heart. He seemed to be totally invisible to everyone else there. I even for a second wondered if I had seen a ghost. But as he turned and smiled I knew he was really there. He commented on the storm and then said he had to go.. he walked along to the elevator with me. We got on and he pressed the Button to get off one floor down. I guess he was checking the lobby's on all the floors. Filling his pack. His version of buying groceries.

I stayed with Mama a whole week in the big Hospital. I spent a lot of my time watching her sleep or talking quietly with her when she was awake. I knitted things that I gave to the nurses who cared for her so sweetly and some doll dresses for my Granddaughter But mostly I worried about the invisible young man. I watched as he moved about the hospital unseen by anyone but me. He would take coffee from under the nose of people smoking outside and I even saw him walk past a table in the cafeteria once and after he passed the woman was looking all around on the floor for a banana. He could have taken some ones purse or wallet or other important things but he didn't. I watched him fill his cigarette pack from the ashtrays every morning and every night. Yet I never saw him ask for a cigarette. I felt as if I was as invisible while watching him as he was to the world that moved around the hospital. I wanted to offer him something. Maybe a meal or a few dollars but for some reason I felt that he would be embarrassed by my offer. I started buying a sandwich from the machine late at night and leaving it sitting on top of the trash can. Hoping he would find it still fresh for his breakfast. I left whole cigarettes for him in the ashtrays. I'd smoke one and leave one. I even put a clean Tee shirt in the lobby trash can and was pleased to see him wearing it the next morning.

It must be awful to be invisible out by the ashtrays. Where people plan extravagant dates and dinner parties and discuss new clothes and expensive pleasure trips. Never looking at the less fortunate ones around them.
I pray for my invisible friend every night now. Him and the many others like him. I pray that he has found a safe place to dream and a dream that will take him away from the streets!
Have a good night, remember to count your blessings; though they may seem to sometimes be few.
Patsy