Tuesday! I don't know what those are... Do You??

"Life is just one damned thing after another." - Elbert Hubbard

"You only live once, but if you work it right, once is enough." - Joe Lewis

"There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle The other is as though everything is a miracle." - Albert Einstein

Today since they are so easy I am asking what these TWO things are..

#1~ Do you know what I am? ~ yes I am edible.. I don't grow on a tree but I do grow under one sometimes... I Can be prepared Grilled, Baked, Broiled, boiled or Fried. I have even been stuffed.. I am mentioned in the Bible... I can be frozen or canned.. By products of me have been used in crafts and in making jewelry.. someone knows exactly what I am.. give it a guess.. Maybe that someone is you!

Update~ I am not a pineapple nor a tuber.. I am not a pepper..It's a handsome quail in the hand of a handsome male.. I personally think a quail has a beautiful feather pattern .. No one guessed this one..

#2~ Are you going to guess what I am? I am not edible.. I am very useful though. I can be made into many things that are used every day by millions of people.. I am also mentioned in the Bible... Someone knows at a glance exactly what I am.. Go ahead .. glance at me and then tell everyone what I am..

Update~ I am not a wind chime or a hanging dangling thing.. I am the center of a lovely lily that makes it's home in the homemade bucket jungle.. My smell is as beautiful as my flower... Phoebe was right about me.. Maybe she recognized me from the jungle?

Today since they are so very easy I have given you two things to guess. I bet that someone will guess them both very quickly.. I think they are both easy.. what do you think they are?... give it a guess.. You might be right.. Please leave me a comment.. Check back tomorrow for the correct answer... Have a wonderful day!

Patsy

Three for you today.. it's Thursday!

"Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for."

"Don't keep a man guessing too long, he's sure to find the answer somewhere else."

"Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from."

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."

"It's not the men in your life that matters, it's the life in your men."

"Save a boyfriend for a rainy day, and another, in case it doesn't rain."

"When women go wrong, men go right after them."
All from Mae West, 1893 - 1980

1~) I missed Mae's birthday on August 17th.. I guess I was battling the modem on that day..
No one knows for sure what year she was born since her stage name has different dates depending on what role she was playing at the time.. She was the highest paid woman in the world in 1935.. earning almost $481,000.. She was a very talented actress and writer.. she wrote or co-wrote almost all of her roles. Once writing a play called "SEX" for which she was arrested...she could have paid a fine and avoided jail but thinking it might be an adventure she chose jail.... she was racy and considered to be a bit too naughty for main stream back then. She was nothing like most women and she made sure everyone knew it... She made remarks both on stage and in life that had hidden sexual tones and double meanings.. She neither smoked nor drank... she believed in equality between men and women and is considered to be both an entertainment legend and an American legend. She earned a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.. Her star is located at 1560 Vine Street.

2~) An Acrostic Poem.

Life

Little moments; big ideas; grand schemes and flops!
Intimacies shared; secrets held; pennies saved in a box.
Friends laughing; enemies kept close; bills; brooms and Mops.
Every breath a different thing; a rose; a bird; or an Ox!

Written BY: Patricia Sawyer
8-20-2009


3~) a riddle- Big as a biscuit, deep as a cup, even a river can’t fill it up. What is it?



I hoped and hoped for rain today.. Thunder and lightening circled around and around overhead covering the sky with a blanket of blackness... even now I can hear a distant rumble as the clouds roll away from us.. No rain so far for my garden.. I guess I'll water a little bit tomorrow morning..My newly planyed peas and beans are growing pretty fast.. we are hoping for one more late crop of veggies this year.. I still have empty jars..

I am so glad to have a modem that hasn't dropped off line even once today..I have caught up on my e-mails.. I was so happy I even read some of the ones that are always showing up in my spam folder.. I farmed a little in Farmville and worked at the factory in Yoville.. and played mafia wars on both facebook and myspace.. I wrote some poems and worked on a poetry class on Allpoetry.com.. I said I wasn't taking any more but I am fond of acrostic poems.. I shared one with you tonight.. It is for that class.. don't be fooled though.. those classes are hard.

I won 16th place in the poetry contests that I talked about a week or so ago.. the one where I submitted the poem called My Song... I was kinda sad till I realized that there was a gazillion entries... for the number of entries.. (thousands actually) 16th place was pretty good.. especially since I had never ever heard of that kind of poem.. ( a solfege) and wrote mine just off the top of my head.. Sometimes that's the best way to write..

Looking at the riddle I just realized that the answer may be hard for some of you modern folks.. the answer is actually rarely used any more and may be a complete mystery to many young people.. Maybe someone will be old enough to know what it is though.. Please leave me a comment if you know and even if you don't have a clue.. I'll be sure to let you know the answer tomorrow! Have a wonderful day!
Patsy

Friday's Advice For the Kids!

"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. "~ P.J. O'Rourke

"Your children will see what you're all about by what you live rather than what you say." ~ Wayne Dyer

"We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today."
~ Stacia Tauscher

I love my children! I love all children. I have decided that from now on every Friday I will share a few words of My infinite wisdom with the "children".

I should of course clarify the term "Children". Children shall be known from now on as any person who is younger than me! It includes my own children and step-children.. it includes Grandchildren .. it includes my daughters in law... it includes younger siblings.. it includes nieces and nephews and and their offspring. It includes all the children who lived in my home for even a short spell of Mothering from me... It includes all the friends ( and enemies) of my children who have visited in my home. It includes the girls who climbed in windows at my house.. and the boys who never made it that far.. I would dare to say that the term "children", as it relates to this blog, includes just about everyone.

Each Friday I will try to share at least five facts that all young people should know. If any of you out there have a question that you would like answered as part of Friday's wisdom for the children just send it right along to me. Now with out further fan fare I will move on to Friday's Five for the kids!

1:) Life is not Fair! It was never fair.. it wasn't fair for me and it won't be fair for you either.. stop sniveling about it and move on.... if you can think of a way to fix it you will become rich and a hero for all future generations.. I will expect my share of the riches... if you can't fix it the suck it up and stop whining! I hate whiners!

2:) Adults do have eyes in the back of our heads! They even have names. They are your neighbors.. they are our friends who just happened to see you going where we told you not to. They are strangers who saw you and told someone who told their cousin who eventually told my brother!Haven't you ever heard the saying "It takes a village to raise a child"? Well it takes a village to rat one out too.. we are adults.. we have learned to work together to make the lives of children miserable!

3:) Good does not ALWAYS triumph evil! Evil doesn't play by the rules. But if good hides behind a wall with a brick in her hand and throws it and breaks evils windshield.... then Good triumphs. ~ No wait!!!! That's not right! Ah shoot who am I kidding.. Good should win out but we all know that sometimes evil wins.. I'm sticking to the good old brick throwing myself.. I'm a real good shot with a red brick...

4:) It is more important to be beautiful on the inside! My Daddy used to say that Beauty was only skin deep but that ugly was to the bone! I am going to tell y'all that I have met some truly ugly people in my life time, but only a few. I have however known some who although they were attractive to look at I soon found them to be "ugly to the bone". But even less than beautiful people can brush their hair and put on clean clothes.. no need to appear uglier than you actually are. A toothbrush applied every day has been know to help those with ugly teeth too.. What I'm saying is that even though some of us will never win a beauty pageant... we can look our best with just a little effort.. so go brush your hair and your teeth and put on a clean shirt before you go to the Wal-mart! Stop by the library on your way back.. smart is very sexy!!!

5:) Play! Have fun when you can. Simple fun is best.. (unless of course you fixed the unfairness of life.. If you did that then I have some wonderful ideas for fun... I thought NOT!) Take walks in the woods. Stand in the edge on the ocean and try to out-run the incoming waves to a certain spot on the sand. ~ ( No one will bother you while doing this.. ignore the gathering crowd.. they too are having fun watching the crazy person who is racing waves!)~ go fishing with a child even the smallest minnow will appear to be a giant when seen through their eyes.
Buy a bag of marbles and try to teach yourself how to shoot them; it's a lost art and much harder than it looks! Buy a checkerboard and visit the nursing home.. someone there has a story to tell and no one to listen. They'll beat you at checkers but you will be wiser when you leave there.(remember smart is sexy!) Swing on a swing in the park. See how high you can go. (I wouldn't recommend the covered slide though.. the fire department has enough to do without coming to cut you out of the kiddy slide!) Hop, skip, play leap frog. Playing is good for you.. It's called exercise! You're going to need to know about that when you get old and fat!

I hope you enjoy this weeks Five for the Kids on Friday! Let me know what you think of the things I put on my blog. I do listen to what everyone says. Thanks for all of those who visit here and a special thanks to those of you who actually read the blog! Have a great Friday!
Patsy

Sometimes It's Easier Done than Said.

"Poets are like magicians, searching for magical phrases to pull rabbits out of people's souls."
~ Glade Byron Addams

"Nobody has ever measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold." ~ Zelda Fitzgerald

"Blessings be with them, and eternal praise, Who gave us nobler loves, and nobler cares!- The Poets, who on earth have made us heirs Of truth and pure delight by heavenly lays."
~ William Wordsworth


Some days words wake me up from a sound sleep. Bouncing around jumping up and down.. Shouting Write me Down; Write me down!! Other days they hide deep in my heart and say "NO Not today" when I ask them to come out and play. What's a poet to do? On those days when words escape me, I usually try and coax them out by taking a walk through my pine trees. Sometimes they like the smell of pine and a few will peek out at me. They might even write a whole poem for me. But thankfully those days have been few and far between for me lately. I write something almost every single day. I don't always share what I write. Sometimes it is just personal thoughts and I feel they might be way too much information for someone else. You know the kids wouldn't like it if I wrote about Me and Dave and Love. I can hear them gagging even at the thought of such a posting. Other times I have written something that came from my heart and even though I may have loved it myself; Upon reading it over I have realized that someone who still lives in this world may not like it for one reason or the other. Those thoughts will stay with me till they can't hurt the feelings of anyone living. I don't want to hurt another by my words.

I often write from presented word lists or even a title. Sometimes I am right on the mark about what a person has felt as they wrote the words to me.. Other times I fear I am off by a mile. That is because words may have a different meaning to me and someone else. For instance, I recently mentioned a bent over tree in a poem. That tree really exists. My brother and sister knew what tree I meant and where it was. Others even e-mailed me to say they also knew of a bent over tree and where was my tree?! I think they wanted to see if I had been in their woods! One man sent me a private message to inform me that a tree could not grow bent over. It would, he said perish and die. Sadly I now inform him that he is wrong. It would be easier to show him a tree that lived and thrived bent over than to argue with him. I think it lived because we as kids ran up and down it so many times filling it's heart with laughter and also tears. Even after I was grown and had children I went to that safe haven to cry a few times. I bet that tree could coax words from me on even the darkest of days!

Sometimes I might touch a person and have words pour over me from their touch. Thankfully that also is rare or I would forever keep my hands in my pockets. I don't always understand the words that I feel when this happens. Recently I had a very special Niece to be hospitalized because her baby had decided that it was time. Needless to say, neither the doctors or even us thought it was time. I along with my Best friend decided to take a trip to see her. We hoped to cheer her up. We spent a few minutes with her but could see that she was tired. I hugged her as I got ready to leave the room and I felt almost as if words would burst from me. They were electrified. The main word I felt was Blessing. I didn't dare write anything in front of either her or My best friend, Sheri. I myself could see no Blessing in her situation. I just knew they would think me crazy as a bedbug if I wrote what I was thinking. I was half afrid for my sanity myself. I promised myself I wouldn't forget the words. I would write them down as soon as I had one single second by myself.

Sheri and I left the hospital and being hungry as we always are when we get the chance for a day out, we decided to stop at Ryans and eat before heading home. As soon as I sat down at the table and she was fixing her plate I scribbled on a Napkin the words to My poem for tonight. Then before she came back to the table I folded it and hid it away to protect myself from those who would have had me comitted for thinking about blessings at a time like we were having. I Have had time to think things over since this was written and I have come to understand that His early birth truly was a blessing. For his death was coming either way. By being born early he was a gift to us all for two weeks. He gave us as a family a common interest to pray about, pulling us together in that regard. He wrapped his tiny finger around his mother's finger for a second one day. The only chance she had to hold his hand. So tiny and yet so beautiful; so perfect. Heart and soul we all Prayed and hoped. Sadly, he was not to stay in this world. We were only blessed By Aiden for two weeks. But I personally thank God for the blessing of his life! Sometimes it's easier to count your blessings when they are good things. I do know how hard it is to understand. But I believe that all things work together for the Good that God intends for us all. I once told My Grandma that sometimes I didn't understand. and she replied." Lord, Child, you will do a whole heap better if you will just accept and count it ALL as blessings. There is no Understanding sometimes till long after you have accepted." Sometimes it's easier to just accept. Sometimes that's easier said than done. Other times it's easier to accept if you don't have to do a lot of talking about it too.. Those times it's easier done than said! Please continue to pray for the parents and families of all the tiny babies who barely visit our lives.! Blessings for only a moment in time! I hope you enjoy today's poem. Be thankful for all blessings that come your way. Be careful to count them every once in a while.
Have a great day!
Patsy

Blessing

Bound By a
Love Never ending.
Every sweet breath
Something special.
So exciting; So perfect.
I am Overjoyed.
Nothing prepared me for this.
God, I thank you for this Blessing!

Written By: Patricia Sawyer
(12-?- 2008) On a Napkin~
1-23-2009 final draft

I dream I am writing....

"If I fall asleep with a pen in my hand, don't remove it - I might be writing in my dreams."
~ Danzae Pace

"Two phrases for you to see what you can do with Green sweater, and rocking chair." ~Anonymous

"If you need some more words...when you have time try these"... ~ Sunshine
~ computer, laugh, forty, April, late, Denver, sweet, children, weight


I love this first quote.. Sometimes I dream I am writing and I Jump from bed and try to remember what I was writing in my dream. I have started keeping a pen and paper next to my bed. Tonight I am sharing two more poems. The first is from the word prompts Green sweater and rocking chair sent to me anonymously. The second is from a word list by one of my most faithful readers, sunshine. I hope you enjoy these two poems. The first one is also acrostic. Reading down the edge, the first letters also have a message. Please enjoy! Have a great day!
Patsy

I Love You Daddy!

Daylight almost always found you
~ Bible in hand rocking by the fire.
Already you had done more than some
~ men do in a day and were about to leave for work.
Doing the work of two men Half your age
~ a factory slave for most of your life.
Daring to marry a young 'un they said wouldn't stay
~ staying together to raise eight. Praying us grown.
You left to soon you know. That Sunday before day
~ Bible at hand, Sitting in your chair. One Last I love you.

I wanted to tell you so many things.
~ I wanted to ask you more questions.

Longing for you. Sometimes I smell your cigar
~ and I feel that you are near.
One of the cool breezes I feel touch me.
~ If I turned would you be there?
Very Likely wearing that Dark green sweater
~ that Mama knitted and you wore so often.
Every day I think of you rocking
~ eyes sometimes closed but not asleep.

Yes, I know you loved every one of us.
~ your children, your brothers, sister, Wife.
One day, we are taught, that we will meet again
~ in Heaven where some circles will be broken.
Until then we miss you Daddy. Mama is lonely
~ and I just wanted to say Daddy I love you!

Written By: Patricia Sawyer
10-16-2008

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fainthearted

Fainthearted need not apply
I read from the want adds
I was wanting a change
A diversion, adventure.
Forty pounds over weight.
Sweet children all grown.
I couldn't even make me laugh.
Nothing but a baseball game
on the box across the room.
Another Lonely woman
sitting in front of the computer.
My home town lie of Denver.
The job I just don't have.
On here I can be anyone.
From anywhere. Any place.
I can even say my early is late.
I can be April or May or Lisa Marie.
Or another girl outside your gate.
Fainthearted?Oh no! Not I.
But don't expect an application
from this bored old gal.
Cause I ain't looking to be used,
abused, stolen from or die!

Written By: Patricia Sawyer
10-28-2008

Happy Grandparents Day!

"Grandchildren are God's way of compensating us for growing old." ~Mary H. Waldrip

"Grandparents are there to help the child get into mischief they haven't thought of yet."
~Gene Perret

"You must teach your children that the ground beneath their feet is the ashes of your grandfathers. So that they will respect the land, tell your children that the earth is rich with the lives of our kin. Teach your children what we have taught our children, that the earth is our mothers. Whatever befalls the earth befalls the sons of the earth. If men spit upon the ground, they spit upon themselves." ~Seattle, Chief of the Duwamish, Suquamish and allied Indian tribes

Grandparents day is a modern holiday. It's another of those holidays made up to sell cards and gifts. I always forget about it unless some one reminds me or as in this year the inter-net reminds me. But in honor of the day I will talk about my own Grand-ma's a little bit. I'm sure I had Grand-pa's too.. I have even heard tales of them.. But they both died before I was born. I sadly missed out on those guys.

My Mama's Mother was Miss Janie Morris. Morris being the name of her third and last husband. Grandma was very particular about things. She was born a planters daughter and his favorite daughter at that. She was sent to a ladies school (Winthrop) to be educated as a teacher. Back then very few young women were educated. She came on the train to teach in a one room school house. It was there that she met My Grandfather and her first husband. He died very young leaving her to raise four children. She married twice after that but never lost her strong minded ways. I used to hate to go visit her because I knew with-out a doubt where I was going to be.. I was going to be sitting on the front step. She wouldn't get a switch or strike you with her hand....She firmly believed in the sitting on the step thinking about what you had done. My Uncle Robert told me that he never could figure that one out.. He said " Damn! she walloped hell out of me and Roberta : and she treats y'all like y'all's ass is glass." He then added that she didn't whip Aunt Dot nor Uncle JC either so maybe their "asses were glasses" too.. I can only assume that he got both his language and his sense of humor from My Grand-father. I assure you she wouldn't have laughed like we did.

She could sew like no one else though.. Making us special dresses for special occasions. She sewed for the public is what she called it. I remember sitting on the steps and looking through the window into her bedroom where she sewed.. she would be bent over the machine working away and humming Hymns to herself. I asked her once if she could make doll clothes and she laughed at me.. saying I was foolish.. "Go sit on the step till you can think of something smart to say!" Needless to say I sat there till time to go home.

But the following month was my 6th Birthday and she brought me a beautiful handmade rag doll in a bright red dress and a perky little hat. . Handing it to me she said " I can do anything I set my mind to and so can you... Take care of this doll to remind you of that." Janie Jane the doll sits right here where I work.. Just in case I need reminding. Grandma did so many things she went to college and taught school. She raised a family and sewed for the public. Her second Husband owed a store and she ran that too. In her older years she worked for the town as a clerk and ran the water office and still she sewed. If she wanted to go somewhere she got in her car and went. She spoke her mind. She even danced a jig that she made up herself.. her own happy dance. She also made the best pound cake and divinity fudge there ever was.. I learned from her that you can indeed do anything you set your mind too.

My Daddy's Mama was Grandma Black. Her real Name was Mozelle. They say I am very much like her. I think I look like her. Grandma Black was a very earthy person. She loved the outside. She too could sew but mostly she sewed quilts for everyone. When she lived in the big house we kids would lay under the quilting frames and listen as the grown ups talked to each other. She kept a quilt in the frames all the time ~ when she wasn't sewing on it she would pull it up to the ceiling on Pulley's and tie it off. Grandma kept chickens in a pen outside. She loved cats but they were outside too.

When her youngest son Married a Lady with three girls, Grandma gave them her house and moved to a little cottage in the woods. She carried her Iron bed; quilting frames and her chickens with her.Once me and Jimmy were at Grandma's house. I'm pretty sure Mama and Daddy had gone to get school supplies for the rest of the crew. Sheron came up the dirt road and told me and Jimmy that she knew where a snake was. Jimmy was excited about that and grabbed a big rock as they ran away to kill it. I followed along and got there just as Jimmy bashed him on the head.. I tried to tell that to Grandma as she was coming out of the woods ~with a switch already in her hand~ But it didn't matter to her. She switched us all a few times on our skinny little legs.. Running Sheron back through the woods to her house and me and Jimmy back up the dirt road to her cottage.

"You don't kill things" she said as she switched our legs.. "You only kill what you need to eat. If everyone killed anything they wanted to the world would be out of whack!" She didn't send us to sit on the steps.. she just said that next time she would tell our Daddy. When we all got back to her house and she washed our faces clear of tears~ she talked to us about nature being balanced and that we had killed a rat snake. I was afraid for a long time that the rats would take over....

Grandma wore a Bonnet and an apron always. The apron was magical. It had a special pocket that held an endless supply of chewing gum and mints. Whatever anyone needed would magically appear from her tiny apron pocket. Tissues for dirty faces and running noses or crying eyes~ a button and sewing needle to fix a shirt~ a few coins for a cold coke. I wanted that apron for myself. When she died they gave me her bonnet~ I really wanted that apron!

A few years before she died Uncle Emmett moved Grandma into a small Trailer almost in his Back yard. They brought along her chickens but she had long since passed the quilt frames on to my Mama. Grandma loved it there except that she was no longer surrounded by the woods. So she grew her own. Grandma could be found most days chopping around in her yard with a hoe. Planting something to feed the Belly or to feed the soul. She grew flowers and tomatoes and cucumbers all there together. Crowded in where ever something would fit. I reckon that's where I get my gardening style. I learned so many things from her. I learned from her that understanding is the hard part.. "Just accept" she said "it's a whole lot easier." I think she meant that for most things in life~ She also taught me how to Bake the very best lemon pies!

Both of My grandma's endured many hardships. They lived through things we can only imagine.
They were very different from each other and yet I believe they respected each other. I never saw them quarrel. One watched Lawrence Welk and one didn't really understand the concept of TV. ... One highly educated and one Barely educated and yet they both were very smart women. They raised my parents. They helped raise us.. They did a great Job! I hope to be as good of a grandmother to my own grandchildren.

If you have a Grandma ~ call her up and say Hi. It will mean more than you know to her.
If you are a grandmother~ Plan a special walk or talk with your grandchildren. Talk them about things that were part of your world but will not be a part of theirs. Tell them about life when your Grandma was young. Share with them of yourself. Have a great day!
Patsy

A poetic Wednesday! ~ Motherhood~

"Grown don't mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown? What's that suppose to mean? In my heart it don't mean a thing. "
~Toni Morrison, ~Beloved, 1987~

" Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials." ~Meryl Streep~

"The most important thing she’d learned over the years was that there was no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one."
~Jill Churchill~





Motherhood Miles

I change the diapers
wash the pot
scrub the floors
dust "what-nots".

I kiss the "boo-boos"
scratch little backs
make the beds
Pack lunch sacks.

I patch the jeans
darn the socks
dry the tears
comb curly locks.

I drink tea
with teddy bears
put on their p.j.'s
and hear childish prayers.

The price might be sanity
paid in milky smiles
but there is NOTHING I would trade
for my motherhood miles!

Written By: Patricia Sawyer
4-12-1989

Today I have chosen quotes and a poem that fits my mood. I reckon I am missing them now that all the children are "grown" and gone. I try to offer advice sometimes but am quickly told they are grown. I am having a hard time learning "My Place" now that they are all adults. I now understand why My grandma said she had "got mad enough to spit" when my Aunt Lucy told her that she was grown. I hope and pray that I live long enough to hear a grandchild tell the same to my own Kids! I have felt like saying it to my own Mama; but I am smarter than that! She still has a stick somewhere I'm sure of it! And I'm too old to run. Besides she has been "grown" a whole lot longer than me and Just might know a little more than I do about life. Have a great Day! And remember grown don't mean much to your Mama!
Patsy

Wednesday's Poem of the Day!

"Heroes are people who rise to the occasion and slip quietly away."
~Tom Brokaw~

"Heroism feels and never reasons, and therefore is always right."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

"Without heroes we're all plain people and don't know how far we can go."
~Bernard Malamud~

Hero's Heartstrings
Tears of joy

come falling down
when they make
the baseball team
the first home run.
the final out.
The honor roll.
The Senior Choir.
The young artist association.
The Jump team.
Or any other minor
or major accomplishment.

Pride fills us
We are their hero
and they are ours.
So short lived is our glory.



For the hero's
become the coaches
the team mates
the teachers
the friends
the neighbors
the lovers
and sometimes Uncle Sam.


But to have held
a hero's place
for only a moment
when no one could
be greater in their eyes
than we so very briefly are
makes all the other tears
worth the pain they leave
as they too must fall.
For every heart that has been broken
can be mended with love.
And a true hero
has a heart that has been quilted
with a Rainbows
many color's of heartstrings!



Written By:Patricia Sawyer
June 19, 2008

My children have always been my heroes. I am so proud of each of them. They have stepped out into adventures I would have been afraid to undertake. They have each taken risks I would have never been brave enough to face. I Have seen each of them struggle and in the end everything ended just right.

Each of my Eight siblings holds a hero's place in my heart just by being the truly wonderful people they have been for all our years together. I love each of them so dearly and also so very differently as they are a truly unique crowd of people.

My Husband, Dave, will always be my ultimate hero. He has Fathered and
be-friended not only the five of his and mine; But all the other kids and strays, (both dogs and people) That either I or one of the children have dragged into his life and his house. Almost, always with-out complaint.

I aspire to be worthy to be; even for a moment; Their hero in return! Allow someone to be your hero. Allow yourself to become someones hero as well!
Have a great day!
Patsy

A Poem for Wednesday!

“Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson~


"You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world. " ~Tom Brokaw~

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. " ~Aristotle~


My Youngest child, Emily, graduates from High School this year. Just a matter of days now. This week in keeping with the Graduating time of year I have chosen this poem for my blog this week. Please take this time as our young folks begin their adult lives to reflect on your own time as a young adult. You might be surprised at how much you have changed. You might even understand your young adults more if you strive to remember how it was to be their age. We all did things we shouldn't have. Well except for me, of course, I was never a foolish young person.. HAHahahahahaha!! Be proud of your young adults. Encourage them daily even when you would like for them to be doing something or going somewhere different. Every one has to find their own path in life. I hope your path is as smooth as possible today as you follow destiny's trail. Destiny sometimes surprises us even after we are adults. May all your days on life's journey be filled with wonder!
Have a great day!
Patsy


My Baby Girl

Barrettes and ribbons
Baby dolls and lace
Ah my baby girl
such a sweet face

Tea parties and Teddy bears
Tree climbing, Let’s race
she might be the smallest
but she demands her own space

Schoolwork and Boyfriends
a Friday night date
Hey mama don’t worry
I just might be out late

Ruffles on prom gowns
a mind of her own
I’m not sure I like this
My baby girl is grown!


written by: Patricia Sawyer
2-21-2008

Penny Day!?!

"Pennies do not come from heaven. They have to be earned here on earth." ~Margaret Thatcher~



“ A Penny wise is often A pound foolish.”
~ French Proverb~


"I would roll up pennies to take the subway to work in Times Square. I was broke, but I was happy." ~Jennifer Garner~




Friday, May 23rd was Penny Day! I was thinking that Morning that a Penny wasn't worth very much any More. That hasn't always been the case. When I was a small child we were tickled to death when Daddy would put a reward on something. You see there were eight of us and somehow, even though we knew better, we would sometimes get a tool of Daddy's or scissors of Mama's and forget to replace them. Daddy would have all of us looking and after a while he would declare the item to have a reward attached. His rewards were usually a nickle or dime in the beginning. A nickel was worth a sack slam full of candy if you shopped carefully.


My Floyd opened the little Country store down the road from our house. He had everything a country family needed from cold drinks to fresh cuts of meat. But best of all he had a well stocked candy county. Sometimes the whole family would take a short walk down there and get a cold drink. Daddy would usually give each of us a dime or a quarter on those days. But at other times if you had a nickel or dime Mama might let you walk down there and shop on your own. I never got past the penny candy section. There were rows and rows of penny candy. I would always look at those first. My Favorite Chick-o-sticks were a penny for a long stick. Mary Janes and Bit-oh-honey were a penny each. There were packs of five Bubble gum balls for a penny as well as many other sweet treats. They had candy Money in long packs for two pennies and sometimes I would get one of those. They were long packs of candy in thin wafers about as big around as a nickle . You could let them melt on your tongue. That way you got a lot of candy for your two pennies. He also had Bubble gum machines that had a wad of gum as big as a golf ball for a penny.


My favorite though was the big tub of two for a penny candy. They were BB bats and caramels and chocolate footballs. My youngest Brother Reuben loved the chocolate footballs. Being that Reuben almost always ran and got the items as son as the reward reached a nickle, He ate lots and lots of those. There were Bubble gums with Comics inside and wax bottles that had a sweet liquid inside. We called those candy cokes. They also had packs that were tiny chocolate balls in long sleeves. A nickles worth of them eaten slow would last a long time.


If you had a penny left over or if you ever got lucky enough to find a penny, you saved it. You wouldn't have to save long to buy a cold drink for a nickle or later for a dime. We would save drink bottles and sell them back to the store owner for a few pennies each. Even after I was a grown up woman and needed some quick cash, I walked along the road and picked up drink bottles to sell. At that time they were a Nickle each. Now we sometimes see people picking up aluminum cans the same way. They aren't making a lot of money at once on those cans but each penny builds up over time. Each penny counts.

I have a can over my washing machine to collect the unwanted penny's that somehow gets left in pockets. I always smile when I find a few pennies in the bottom of the washer. It's a reminder of the times when I stood in awe at Mr. Floyd's; and later after Mr. Floyd died; at My Uncle Oneal's store and jiggle the few penny's in my pocket as I tried to decide how I would spend my few pennies.
Every once in a while I empty that can into a large pickle jar and watch as my pennies grow and grow. Dave and I took our honeymoon on rolled change. Most of it pennies. We had a wonderful time. A few years ago we took all but one of our Children and one Grandson to the beach for a week-end on rolled change. Again most of it pennies. We didn't spend a lot but we had a great time. In Fact that is one of my best beach memories. Paid for mostly with pennies.

I went to the grocery store Friday and asked the cashier if, being that it was Penny day, they had anything for a penny. I had to laugh when she looked at me as if I was for certain retarded if not actually a crazy person. She simply asked with the stricken look on her face... " Mam, Are you OK?" I smiled and told her her believed I was. I was walking out with my purchases when the young man who had bagged my items came running along besides me and said.. " Mam, I think they still sell one cent stamps here... you know because they just went up and you might have had some of the old ones.." I tipped him a whole dollar for that information as I hurried over to the customer service counter to ask for something that I could pay for with a single solitary penny!

Pennies are not worth much alone but still I save them. They allow me to save a tiny bit here and there. I always toss all pennies into a jar. People used to say a Penny saved is a penny earned and I say NO.. A penny saved is just a penny saved. A penny earned takes work and time. Now a found penny saved is even better because you didn't work for it it was a gift. Tiny but a gift none the less. If You find a penny pick it up. If you don't want it drop them into a jar for a needy person somewhere. Even a penny counts in their lives. I don't think there will be many more days when we can Buy anything for a penny. There have been discussions of getting rid of the penny altogether. But I will always remember the wonderful things a penny has bought for me.. From a Mary -Jane when I was a tiny girl to the Honeymoon week-end in the Fancy Hotel years later.


I haven't really been looking but since Friday I have found eleven pennies. I have felt blessed eleven times.Not because I can buy anything with a penny but simply because I feel that they are very tiny gifts. Very tiny blessings can grow into large blessings. I know it can take a long, long time for pennies to amount to much but if you pick up every one you see you just might be surprised. I actually could have bought a piece of my favorite candy; a chick-o-stick; with those eleven, at a store here in town. I tossed them in my jar. Who knows what Dave and I will do with the next batch we roll.


Enjoy life. Remember that Sometimes even small things like a penny can build into something larger.. something richer.. Appreciate the small things in life.
As they used to say "A Penny for your thoughts!" ; May all your thoughts be worth at least a penny!
Have a great day!
Patsy

The Worse Date of my life!

"A man on a date wonders if he'll get lucky. The woman already knows."
~ Monica Piper~



"I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog." ~ Wendy Leibman~



The shrilling ring of the phone began as soon as the bedroom door closed behind me. I glanced back at the door thinking that if that phone woke up my babies someone was going to die tonight. Emily was back in her bubble like tent after another bout with Asthma and Cooper had not wanted to sleep without her. He had demanded I sing Cum Ba Ya for at least five hundred verses. He loved that song. He loved the someones working and someones crying verses but he loved the someone is singing verse most of all. He would sing with his small voice for hours when he didn't want to go to sleep. " Some one is singing Lord Cum Ba Ya!" Over and over we had sung till finally he had give up and went to sleep. Now it was after ten o'clock and I was plum wore out. Anthony was gone for the summer to work in watermelons at my sisters so I was handling the little ones all alone. We had been today for a cancer treatment for Emily. Cooper was cranky. We Both were cranky. I snatched the phone off the hook ending the ring and as quietly as I could I said Hello.


"Hey Girl, What ya doing?" It was Tracy, a girl I knew from a store close to where I lived before I moved here. Before the divorce. Before the world started making me mad. She was just a person I knew Not someone I would have expected to call me. "I got your number from your Brother-in-law" she said, "he was just in here a while ago. I tried to call you but you didn't answer." I began to explain that It had been a rough day and I had been getting the kids down.

"Oh I don't care about all that." she said, "I have a guy for you to meet. You need to go right now to Harry's and he is...."
"Hold On" I said. " who is this Guy?" She had the whole thing planned out for me.. He was someone I didn't know But he was right now waiting for me to show up at a local bar. I would know him she said by who he was with. He was with her own Husband right now.. I had to go there right now..He wanted to meet me right now..


There were so many things I felt like I needed to know before I loaded up to go meet a stranger in a bar. Not to mention that now was really not a good time.I was tired. I had just got the babies to sleep and what was I supposed to do with them while I traipsed around to a bar this late at night? She had all that worked out too. I was to load them up and take them to my sisters house. she had already asked Trudy and Trudy had told her she would watch them. I asked how old he was and she swore he was our age. There were really a lot of things that didn't suit me about this date but they talked me into it. They brushed aside all my complaints.Trudy was waiting on the sleeping kids and Tracy was going to come to the Bar just as soon as she could get there.. Hurry they said he is waiting and he's nice and on and on. Giving the bedroom door one more glance and saying a silent prayer that I would not regret this I hurried to the shower. It was by Now eleven pm and I still had to drive the babies to my sisters house, But I wasn't going to meet a man in the clothes I had worn all day.. I still had some pride after all.


I walked into the bar at eleven thirty seven.And looked around for John. He was Tracy's husband and Was supposed to be with the man of my dreams. Well at least Tracy's dreams for me. I spotted John near the back of the bar in a booth and headed that way. I had never been in that bar before and was surprised to see a lot of people I knew. A lot of People I saw had went to High school with me. I was stopped a few times before I reached the table. I had dressed in a pair of jeans and a tank top with a white long sleeved shirt open over that. I wasn't vain but I knew I looked pretty good for a woman thirty two years old. I looked pretty good for a Mom of three. I hadn't started dating yet. This would have been my first date. I didn't like the way it had happened but I was still hopeful. I walked up to the table where the two men sat with a little hope in my heart. My instinct had warned me.. But I was here now. I was ready for this date.


John was sitting across from a very nice looking young man. He didn't look my age. He looked much younger than me. John was my age. But John was also much older than Tracy. Maybe she had meant he was her age. They both had their legs stretched out across the bench on the side they were sitting on I stood at the end of the booth and waited for them to offer me a seat. I said Hi and reached to shake his hand saying " You Must be Mike?" He nodded then waved for the waitress to come over. " Yea " he said " I'm Mike" He and John both ordered beer. I wanted a coke but no one offered me a drink. They still hadn't offered me a seat. I was beginning to get a head ache from the loud music and all the smoke. I was also getting angry that not only was he way younger than me But he was rude as well. I wondered what Tracy had been thinking. Where was she any way? I knew the store was already closed. I was about to just walk out when a guy who went to school with me, came over and asked me to dance. His wife was already on the floor and the song was rather slow. I figured I might as well get something for my trouble so I walked away and left the two of them still laughing and talking together. They didn't even appear to miss me when I looked back from the dance floor. I knew this was a bad idea. I told my dance partner. He laughed and asked me where my ex was. He was shocked that I was divorced. I was shocked when he pulled me closer to his body after learning I was single after an eighteen year marriage.


Finally the dance was over and I had just walked away from the second man in one night. I felt as if this must be some crazy nightmare. I even for a second thought maybe I was asleep on the bed beside Cooper having sung myself to sleep right along with him and Em.I pinched myself to make sure. I really was in a bar in the middle of the night and My kids really were with Trudy. I felt stupid. I went to the bar and asked if they had coffee. The female bartender laughed at me and said I could get a cup at the store next door. I thanked her and was about to leave when John waved me over again and shouted my name. I went over again and this time I asked if I could sit down. Mike moved his legs and allowed me to sit by him. He was extremely tall and had the greenest eyes I believe I had even seen. He truly was very nice looking. But I was mad now. I had no intention of being nice at this point. He was way to young. He hadn't bought me a coke. I was way to tired for this whole thing.


"Look, I have to go." I said as I reached for a napkin. I asked John to borrow the pen I could see in his shirt pocket and wrote my number on the napkin. " "Mike, I'm not sure we should date, But call me tomorrow if you still want to go out and we will set something up between us." I said handing John his pen and Mike the folded napkin. I was going home. My head was pounding and my heart was not. I had made a mistake. " Hey Patsy" he said as I started to walk away, " how old is your baby?" I stopped and looked at him wondering if he had really said Baby. Not children or even Kids. He said Baby as if I only had one lone child. I was going to kill Tracy if I even saw her again. I explained that I had three children. He nodded when I said Emily was two years old. He even nodded when I said Cooper was four years old. I have to give the young man credit that he didn't faint when I said that Anthony was fourteen years old. But what he said scared me to death. He said. " Wow, he's only six years younger than me. I bet me and him will be friends." I tried to smile but couldn't I was suddenly feeling sick. I ran from the bar and all the way to my car. I got in and locked the door then sat there and cried. I wasn't supposed to be at a bar meeting a man who was twelve years younger than me. I wasn't supposed to be out in the middle of the night with my kids at my sisters house. I wasn't supposed to be a single mom at all. Then I heard the knocking on my window.


I didn't know the man outside the glass. He was standing there holding a steaming cup of coffee and smiling at me as if we were old friends. I rolled the window down and he handed me the coffee.. "Here" he said, "I see you are new at this dating thing." I nodded as I tried to wipe the tears away. He assured me it got better and that I would find a lot had changed since I had been out there in the world. He reminded me to be careful. Then he laughed and said I shouldn't accept drinks, even coffee from strangers. I felt better as I drove to My sister's house and got my kids.


Emily never knew she had been on a midnight ride that turned into the worse date of my life. Cooper woke up as I carried him back to his bed and demanded that I sing again. I was glad to sing him a few verses as he fought to stay awake for only a few minutes before he gave a great sigh and curled into a sleeping ball. I closed their door for the second time and headed off to bed myself. I was glad I had gone even though it hadn't been a good idea. I had learned something tonight. I had learned that people mean well but that I might better hunt my own dates from now on. I also learned that I would be treated different since I was a divorced woman. I also decided that I was worthy of the best life had to offer and that I wouldn't settle for less than the best.


I never saw the coffee bearing stranger again. I asked about him in the bar but no one could remember having ever seen him. I did see Mike one more time when he came by my house one night UN-invited and drunk, hoping for, as he called it, a little older woman fun. I explained to him that he was way too young for me and that he needed a girl his age. I forgave him for being not what I was looking for. He was just a kid compared to me. I hope life is treating him good now. Tracy and John divorced a few years after that. I think life is treating her good. He's still being himself. Still hanging in the same bar. I never did date anyone from the bar. I only dated two men after the divorce. The second one was my prince charming. He and I have been married what seems like a life time. I didn't settle. I got the best.


Never trust someone Else's word when it comes to a date with a stranger. If something feels wrong it most likely is. And remember that Our age only works if you and she are really the same age! Laugh at me.. I know you are. I am too. I wouldn't change my life but God knows I wouldn't live it over.. especially that date! The worse date of my life! Have a great day!
Patsy

Under the Quilt

Love if you have it you don't need anything else, and if you don't have it, it doesn't matter what else you have. ~ J.M. Barrie~

While we may be of different faiths, we have a strong sense of faith, family, community. We hold the values of freedom and human rights very high and I think that those are all a part of a very strong quilt that binds us together. ~Robert Menendez~


My first memory of My Grandma is of her legs and feet. We would go to her big old house every Saturday night just before it got dark outside.Daddy and the Uncles would be outside doing things around the place. I was never quiet clear on the mysteries of what they did. I know they had pigeons out there because we could see them fly sometimes. I also know they had hunting dogs in big pens. Us kids weren't allowed to befriend the hunting dogs. Uncle Neal said it would mess them up. My Mom and Grandma and the aunts would gather around in the hot, wood heated, Kitchen and soon they would lower the frames from the ceiling and they would quilt. They Made a few quilts every year each of them sewing dainty little stitches as they sat and talked. No one in Our Family would be cold.

Us little kids would all be sent to play on the floor beneath the quilt where they could know where we were. There was no room for us to play anywhere else. Sometimes My cousins would be there and we might play Barbies or sometimes Go fish cards. Sheron even had a checker board and some drink bottle caps that we could play with when she was there. The Older children always gathered on the back porch. There were cousins of all ages too But you had to be what was considered a big kid to get out from under the watchful eyes of the women. By the time I was a big kid the gatherings had stopped but I'll always remember those wonderful days. The days when I was sent to play under the quilt!

I loved my cousins a lot. Sheron was my favorite. She still is in a lot of ways. She is just a tiny bit older than me. Not quiet a year But she was a lot of fun. I loved Playing under the quilt with Sheron. But Most of all I loved it when the cousins didn't come.

When The cousins didn't come I would lay quietly under the quilt tent by myself and listen to the grown ups talk. I couldn't see their mouths but I could see their feet. My Grandma would pat her foot up and down as she told some tidbit of rumor to my Mom. Sometimes if she was trying to make a strong argument for something she would even stomp her foot up and down. My Mom didn't move her feet too much. She mostly kept her feet crossed and still. But Every once in a while she would uncross her feet and slide them back and forth over the hardwood floors or raise and wiggle her toes. Aunt Rose had pink painted toe nails. Aunt Lucy always wore white socks. Aunt Frankie didn't quilt. She wore loafers and stood propped by the counter sometimes. But most of the time she would go outside with Her husband Emmett. Or on the porch and look at a magazine.


Grandma always wore the same thing on her feet. Plain brown slip-on shoes, over stockings that came just above her knee. She wore plain brown garters around those to hold them in the exact spot that she wanted them. I would watch her feet and listen to her tell the most wonderful stories. Sometimes I would imagine her feet dancing or running although I never saw her do either. She loved to walk and I walked with her many times. I would have liked to see her run though.

I learned so many things laying under the quilt surrounded by feet. I learned that the preachers widow was courting the school teacher when I was too little to care about courting. I learned that Babies take forty full moons to come long before I knew what a full moon was or where babies were coming from. I learned that homing pigeons could be trained to bring and carry important messages or secrets. And that wearing red to a wedding or a funeral meant bad luck to the wearer. I learned recipes for foods that I have never cooked and I learned that Women who love each other share a special bond. A bond that brings them to share their thoughts and opinions with each other without fear of shame or censure. Their words to each other have a flow that becomes over time almost poetic. And that their feet often keep time to the music that only their hearts can hear! Let your heart music Move your feet. If you have family or friends in your life share with them in a relaxed place. Be open with them. If you have children, let them learn form seeing you interact with your family and friends. Let them learn about what moves your feet and your heart.
Love Many! Trust a few! Harm None!
Have a great Day!
Patsy

Out Living Youth

Wisdom doesn't automatically come with old age. Nothing does -- except wrinkles. It's true, some wines improve with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place. ~Abigail Van Buren~

The young have aspirations that never come to pass, The old have Reminiscences of what never happened~ Saki~

Every Birthday, you decide whether to mark it the end of your greatest days or the beginning of your finest hour. ~ Oprah Winfrey~

Americans are living longer than ever before. With better health care, early screenings and people choosing healthier lifestyles, this trend is expected to continue. In Fact, the population of elderly is expected to increase. It is estimated that by the year 2040 the Old folks will account for twenty-three percent of all Americans. Nearly one half of those will be over the age of Eighty-five! I plan to still be here annoying my kids and Grand kids when My age group is the largest of all age groups.

When I was very young I always thought my Daddy was very old. This was when he was in his late thirties and early forties. I was always sure he would fall over and die any second. And yet he lived on. The older I got The more his oldness multiplied in my mind and yet he lived on till I was an adult and had began to feel old myself. My Daddy died of Congestive heart failure at sixty-six years old. It was then that I decided that Daddy was quiet young. Especially too young to die. My Mother has reached the ripe old age of seventy-four and as far as I am concerned she is way to young to die. She has some health issues and has lived with both myself and my oldest sister for small amounts of time. But she wants to live alone in her own home. She says she likes doing her own thing. That bothered me. My Mama isn't supposed to be doing a THING. I thought she was too old! Then she reminded me that she is only twenty five years older than me. That really isn't all that much older. She likes her lifestyle. She says she gets lonely sometimes. She knows she could live with some of her children. There are eight of us she could travel around from one house to the other and never get tired of any of us but Like most older people, she wants her own home, Her own lifestyle.The elderly are no different that any of the rest of us. We all want to do things our own way! I do and I'd bet you do too.

I used to run a small day care. I have kept hundreds of children either in my home or when I worked in the day care field for someone else. I have kept bad kids and sweet angelic cherubs. I have changed diapers and wiped noses. I have read stories and watched Disney movies for many years. But I have given that up. I had decided last year that I had to have a break from all of that. It had got to the point that I needed a time out! I had been resting from having a job And then came the phone call from My oldest Brother. He and his wife needed a baby sitter they said. They never doubted whether or not I could do it. They never questioned whether I'd be good at it or not. They hoped I would accept their offer of a new line of work. After talking to them both I accepted their offer and thus began my new Job!

I have always known Miss Kathleen. I have always liked her as well. She and I are both word lovers. She has wonderful stories of how she met her Husband in Liverpool ,England during the second world war. She tells me those wonderful stories every day. And I listen carefully and ask questions of her every day. She loves to be heard. She loves to talk. She and I talk all day some days. Miss Kat is 84. She is forgetful. She has fallen before and broke her hip. She is afraid of falling. She has a walker but she tries not to use that. I encourage her to use it but she doesn't like it because it makes her look old she says. I told her that she was old. In fact I told her she was older than the devils own dirt. She laughed out loud when I told her that and she said to me. " Yes child I know WE are but One never wants to show their true age." And so there she and I sat laughing the day through at the idea that we had out lived the devils own dirt. Miss Kat is lucky. She has been in the nursing home for recovery when she broke her hip. She doesn't want to go back. As long as her health allows she will be living happily with her daughter. She is lucky she has family that wants her to be happy. Not all of the elderly are so blessed.

My Grandmother was in a nursing home. We made long trips every weekend to see her and visit her as long as she lived. Her health was poor, her memory all gone and we weren't equipped to care for her at home. We would have loved to but some times circumstances make that impossible. Grandma was also lucky. She was well cared for and her children cared enough to visit. Not all of the elderly are lucky. Even some with Family aren't treated well.

We all see it on the news occasionally. We tend not to really notice though. Someone has harmed and old person somewhere. We comment that we wouldn't stand for that if we were old. But we wouldn't really have a choice. Sometimes the remains of an older person is found and they have been dead for a long time. We tend not to pay that much attention either. Except to wonder why no one smelled them. We may see an elderly person sitting in a hot car in front of a supermarket. Do we not realize that they are dehydrating as they sit there in the sweltering heat? Or do we see them and look away. If you leave a dog in the hot car they will arrest you. But go ahead and leave Great Aunt Sue. No one will notice. Great Aunt Sue has outlived her youth. We will ignore her from now on. She will be shoved into a nursing home and never checked on if she doesn't have family. And even then she may go weeks and months and even years without a VISITOR. There are many things the nursing staff can do for their childlike elderly patients. Most nursing homes have wonderful caring nurses and helpers. They keep the people in their care clean and fed and comfortable but they are overwhelmed with the numbers. They do all they can. Sometimes it isn't enough.

With improved health care we all stand a chance of living into our eighties, nineties or even for some of us to the ripest of old age beyond One hundred. Last week in the obits in a local paper, the youngest person who had died was a wreck victim who was sixty three. As I sat there reading the obits I began to think of all the Old people I used to see when I visited Grandma. They would gather around and listen as we talked to her. Some would even talk to us as if they were giving us the answers that she couldn't. Since She either couldn't or wouldn't speak we often talked to her as if she was a child. One old lady once told me. " Don't talk to her like she is a fool and she won't look at you as if you are a fool."I never spoke to Grandma in a condescending tone again. I was afraid of her room mate.. I realized that they understood each other even If I understood neither of them.

I am forty eight years old. I know my children see me as very old. I expected that they would. It is the nature of the young to see us that way. Old and in a lot of areas they think we are foolish. They think we have outlived our youth. I figure if I am going to live well into my eighties that I will be older than dirt at around seventy five. Until then I am going to be a rocking and rolling Grandma. I am not going to be told what to do. I am going to do my own thing. Even if My children don't want me to have an own thing to do. And until then I am going to notice the elderly around me. I am going to learn from them now before they truly are gone. I am going to ask them to tell me their stories. Then I am going to actually listen as they do. If I see great Aunt sue sitting in your car in a hot parking lot I am going to call the police. Then I am going to ask her to roll the window down if she can and I will be standing there with her when you come out or the cops arrive which ever happens first. For your sake I hope it's the cops. So if you have a great aunt sue.. don't leave her in a parked car near me.

Finally I have a challenge for anyone who may read this. Do something kind for an elderly person. If you have one in your family, call them when you can spend ten minutes checking on them. If they call you, give them ten minutes of your time. If you have both Kids and older folks in your family. Get them together then sit back and watch the beautiful way they reach out to each other. I love to watch my Grandson read to Miss Kat every day. He reads his homework reading assignment sitting on a stool by her chair. They both enjoy it. But not nearly as much as I do. His young voice is free and strong as he reads her his second grade story. He relaxes and if he misses a word she never notices. He is relaxed so he rarely misses any but she wouldn't care. Her head is tilted just a little to the side and she listens as if the story is a wonderful thing to her. When he is done she always pats his hand and says.. " Wonderful, Simply wonderful. You are a great reader."Then they both grin at me and ask for "tater chips please". I try to take him to visit My Mother when I can. He loves her house. He says she has lots of stuff. And he likes that. If you don't have any old people in your family I am sure the nursing home near you would be happy to help you adopt a Grandma or grandpa from some of their old folks. They will know who would be better suited to a child of what ever age you may have. They will know who has no visitors for days, weeks, months and years. I plan to do what I can for the fastest growing group of Americans before I become one of them. Won't you join me in helping the aged before you too out live your youth? Be kind to the Elderly. Remember that they will most like get to God before you will. He will hear their side of the story first! I'm hoping when he hears about how I treated someone old, he will pleased. After all he is pretty old Himself.
Have a great day!
Patsy

The Long Way Round

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. ~ Doulas Adams -( 1952-2001)

When I was around five I wanted to be a trapeze artist. I had heard of them from my brother David, He had been to the circus and seen one there. I had never seen one but I knew I wanted to be one. I would hang upside down from the top of our swing set and flip and pose for the entire Back yard to watch in wonder. Of Course the only watchers were the chickens and hunting dogs But still I put on a pretty good show. My brother Frank saw me from the garden where he was hoeing one day and with some rope and an old broom handle he made me a swing high up in the China berry tree. I would climb up the boards he nailed to the tree and climb out onto my swing and practice my moves for hours. I could hear the roar of the crowds and the applause in my young mind. I just knew I would be a famous circus performer one day.

A few months later I decided I wanted to be a ballerina. Jimmy nailed a couple of wedges of wood across the back of the smoke house and after adding the handle from daddy's best shovel he declared that it was now my studio complete with a practice barre. I had discovered Ballet while looking through the New World Books Daddy had bought from a salesman. I would hang onto My barre in the back of the smoke house as I ignored the canned goods lining the walls and the ropes of sausage hanging from the ceiling. I could do all of the basic moves. I could twirl and stand on my toes. I was convinced I'd be a great dancer some day.


I was always changing my mind about what I wanted to be. When I got an easy bake oven I swore I would be a great chef some day. My Oldest Sister Trudy would help me mix up cakes and I'd bake one of the cookie sized cakes for every member of the family. I loved My oven till the light bulbs Burst inside the little oven and Daddy took it away. They made a new version after My own children came along. Both my daughter and my step daughter had their own. They too wanted to be chefs for a short time!

I wanted to be many different things. But I always from my first day of school wanted to be a writer. When they made me read ~run spot run ~ I wanted to be a writer. I told the teacher, Miss Dunbar that I would write better stuff than that . I despised Dick and Jane. I whined over Sally and Spot. Finally Miss Dunbar gave me a book from her shelf. It was called " The Big Yellow Umbrella". She told me that if I could read it and tell her what it was about she wouldn't make me read Dick and Jane any more. I read her wonderful book about an Umbrella and was in love with words. From the day I stood in front of her desk with my hands clasped behind me and told her about the book that she didn't think I could read, I never had to read Dick and Jane again. Miss Dunbar was a great teacher. She realized that I had five siblings older than me. She realized that I might already know how to read some words. She even allowed each of us to write something for the class to read aloud. My sentence was " One day I will be a writer and write sentences that will be read a lot by other people." I was the only one who could read it. But Miss Dunbar let me read it to the whole first grade class. I thought they would cheer; they frowned at me.. They called me names. I was different they said.

I was in love with words. I would read every word I could find. I would write words on the wall inside the smoke house when I was supposed to be practicing my Ballet. I would write words in the dirt with a stick beneath the shade of my china berry tree. The rope and broom handle swing rotting away above my head. I wrote poems and stories for my neighbors children and later for my younger brother and sister. I wrote extra stuff for school. Sometimes writing two or three for each assignment then choosing what I thought was best. I even decided to change the smoke house from a ballet studio to a writers studio. Dragging myself a peach crate in there and setting up my own office. I was going to write a mystery book and My sister Mary who was handy with a pencil and could draw anything at all was going to illustrate it. We were talking about it a while back she thinks we could still write a book like that, maybe one day we will..

And then I became a teenager. I was a good teenager. I always did my chores. I helped out in Mama's daycare center with the small kids. I loved to read them stories or make up stories for them.My youngest brother Reuben,would beg me for stories and I would make them up as I went along. I'm sure sometimes I had facts confused but little kids didn't care they loved my stories. I would write things for school and the teachers would tell me that the stories were wonderful, But that I HAD to write in proper form. I hated that too. It was as bad as reading Dick and Jane. And then I discovered the boys. Writing wasn't as interesting to me as were the boys.

I got married the first go round at sixteen. That marriage lasted for eighteen years. I actually did a good bit of writing during those years. Besides the stories I wrote for My oldest son , who came along when I was almost nineteen, I actually wrote a few times for money. I wrote for a newspaper for a while. My Sister-in-law, Camella, and I often working together. We liked to expose things that we thought were secrets or injustices. We would sometimes cause a stir here in this small town. People thought we were trouble makers. I wrote short stories for a couple of magazines and was published quiet a few times. But even though I was writing, I was way off track. Life wasn't taking me where I wanted to go. I wasn't headed in the right direction and I knew it. But I was; I thought; trapped . Finally I bought a lock box and pushed everything inside it and found me a job in a factory. Living takes money and writing was just for fun. And I was a mother with a child so I had to have steady money. I would write sometimes on my napkin as I ate supper in the green walled cafeteria where I worked. I would toss the napkins into my box at home and never look at it again. I wanted to write but I couldn't, life was leading me down another road.

Life took a big turn for me in nineteen ninety. My youngest child Emily was born just after the new year. Emily was sick from day one. I had two other children too and they had almost become my Mama's kids. Anthony was twelve and Cooper was sixteen months old. I was at the hospital and they were with my parents. I missed them But life was taking me where it wanted me to go. I wasn't writing now. I was to busy worrying about my sons, watching over my daughter, and learning to be a single Mother. I was divorced with a sick child and two sons besides her. I was way too busy to write.

I did keep a diary all those years. I pulled out some of the old ones a few months ago. I laughed about some of the things I wrote there. Entry's like ~Thanks God Cooper isn't a midget~ caused me to roll across my bed as laughter pealed from my lips. Cooper is well over six foot tall. But I remember when the nurse told me they thought he would be a midget. They measured him constantly until he grew a tiny bit.. He grew slow.. He took the long way round to get there but now he is Tall. Other entries caused me to cry. ~ Mike died cause we didn't match~ caused me to hang my head and weep remembering the little boy who was Part of Emily's cancer support group. We were all tested for a bone marrow transplant but none of us matched. I was devastated when he died. I was so afraid that Emily would be the next one to go.. And yet she recovered and will graduate from high school this year.

I married for the second time in nineteen ninety four. This Husband, who remains the best thing in my life, came with two more children and a whole lot more work required as a stay home mom. And even the diary stopped for many years. I didn't miss writing. I was way to busy being a Mom and step-mom and wife. I was off on a new path. I read every thing I could get my hands on and I even have some books where I wrote an extra bit in the back. I guess I didn't quiet like the ending of those so I "fixed" it. But I wasn't doing any real writing.


Last Summer, Dave and I went to the beach for a week-end, Taking Cooper and one of his skater friends along. Dave and I were going for a relaxing rest and the boys intended to skate. We even checked into a motel right across from the skate park so that they could run across to it without us having to drag them every where. Something happened that week-end. I was watching Dave sleep and the boys were skating. words began to pour through my mind. I hunted a pencil and searched the room for paper. I finally found a pen but no paper. I made so much Racket that Dave woke up and offered to take me to wal-mart to get what ever I wanted. He had that, I think she's lost it look on his face but still he was willing to haul me, in my crazy state, to wal-mart. I was ready and in the car before he could get his shoes on. I bought paper and two pens. I bought a folder for finished stuff and a pencil with a packet of erasers in all shapes and sizes. Rushing to get it all and get back to the room Just as my mind went Blank. I managed to hold on to one poem as all the other words ran away. But they were only hiding for the week-end.

I have wrote something every single day since then. I have learned something about me too. I was always a writer. I was writing when I rocked Emily in intensive care and told stories that the nurses would sometimes stand still and listen too. I was writing when I explained to my children that sometimes people just have to move into new houses and families have to divide. I was writing when I explained to my new love what Life meant to me and how he would have to act if he intended to share this wonderful life with me. I was writing when I mitigated problems between his children and mine convincing them that we were all going to make it.. I was taking the long road, But I was headed in the right direction.

Last night I sat in my Baby sisters living room and watched her youngest son climb up and down on Dave's knee. He took a liking to Dave last night like never before. Dave has that effect on children sometimes. All of mine say he's a hero. His know he is the greatest dad. And I tell everyone he's my soul mate. Martha had been sitting quietly watching them, when suddenly she asked me. "Patsy, do you remember taking me, when I was little, to run through Emmett's wheat field?" I smiled because I had forgotten till she mentioned it. She talked about how the wheat felt so silky as it brushed against her skin. She said she remembered that I took her there and told her to run and feel the wheat brush against her. She said I took pictures of her there so we could remember the fun that day. She's ten years younger than me so her memory is better. I asked her where we were heading. She laughed and said.. " We were walking to Grand-ma's House." I frowned and said "well we were way off track for Grandma's house.. We could have been to Grandma's house quicker another way." She just laughed and said.. "Yea Patsy, But you ALWAYS took the long way round!"

My sister was right. I always took the long way around. If I was sent next door to borrow sugar I would go way out in the woods behind our house and then run back to the neighbors house. Being sent to grandma's house just a small distance away often meant a trip to the railroad tracks or through My uncle Emmett's fields. I always looked for something more. I was on the right track all along. I was just taking the long way around! Don't be afraid to try paths you haven't walked before. Never fear the unknown. Sometimes there is a short way to reach your destination. But I'm sure you will have more fun and maybe learn something extra if every once in a while you will take the Long way around! Have a great day!
Patsy

The Invisible Man

No one is asking what happened to all the homeless. No one cares, because it's easier to get on the subway and not be accosted. ~Richard Linklater

I would do anything for my Mother. That is how I became aware of the invisible man. Last July Mama got sick. Now Mama hates hospitals almost as much as I do and had never been admitted to one except for the times she was there to have babies. She doesn't count those eight times. This time though Mama wasn't going to come home with a bundle of joy. I wasn't sure Mama was going to come home at all. But for now she and her sick heart were upstairs under the attention of her other seven children and her first Non baby toting nurse. I was leaning against the ashtray outside. I was trying to get me a few more puffs in before I had to return to the sterile heart ward to guard my Mother through the night.

I watched him walk past me and then come back and ask for a light. I shared my lighter and small talk as he lit a half smoked cool and propped up there beside me near the ashtray stands. He wore jeans slung low on a skinny butt. Much too thin for my taste even had I been in the market for a man. His hair could have used a trim but wasn't unfashionably long. It appeared clean. He had a tattered gray backpack hanging from one Bony shoulder. His green eyes smiled as he stood laughing as I related to this stranger how the ambulance driver had scared me on the sixty mile ride from My Tiny town to this bigger, better equipped for sick people, City. He agreed that they could be scary behind the wheel. I was sure he was a Doctor or at the very least a medical student. He wished me luck as I turned to go back inside. I did look back once as I walked away. He was tucking something into the side pocket of his Backpack.

Morning finally came peaking through the clouds.. A light rain was falling as My sisters came quietly into the room. They were glad to take over the guarding of our mama and allow me to get some coffee and a smoke. I rode the elevator to the lobby amazed at the early morning bustle of the large City Hospital. Our own tiny hospital only a forth the size, if that, of the one where they had sent my Mama. Congestive heart failure meant Mama had to be moved. And I knew Mama wouldn't go alone. So I had come with her. I would do anything for my mama..She would do anything for me.

I followed my nose to the coffee shop once I reached the ground floor. Just as I went in I saw my stranger friend from the night before cut across the lobby. He was again carrying his back pack. On the way to learn more about Doctoring I thought Watching him hurry to catch the elevator.

I was glad to see others near the ashtrays this morning. I like people in general and like to listen as other people talk to each other. Some call me nosy. I just think I'm curious. I had found me a spot on a ledge near the stands and was enjoying the vacation planning of a couple near me when I first heard the angry yell. "Who took my coffee?' the man yelled looking around at the rest of us. No One answered as he continued to look around for his missing cup. I looked around too, now fully alert and on the look out for a thief with a coffee cup. I only saw the young man from last night as he turned the corner heading away from the pack of early smokers. Just as he turned his profile was turned to me and I saw him drinking from a large coffee. He almost seemed to be laughing as he hurried away into the parking garage. Something about him stuck with me as I walked back to the elevator. I didn't know what yet but I was nosy. I would figure it out.

The rains came hard and fast that afternoon as Mama slept a drugged sleep. I decided a cup of soup from the cafeteria would sooth me. As I walked down the hall towards the elevator I caught a glimpse of the young man again. He was hurrying away from the trash can; Near the snack machines in the Lobby; right beside the nurses station. He had His back pack off and was stuffing it with packages half full of crackers and some sandwiches that they had taken out of the machine earlier that day. Out of date food and two past their prime apples. It was then that I realized that the man I had thought was a doctor was Homeless. It broke my heart. He seemed to be totally invisible to everyone else there. I even for a second wondered if I had seen a ghost. But as he turned and smiled I knew he was really there. He commented on the storm and then said he had to go.. he walked along to the elevator with me. We got on and he pressed the Button to get off one floor down. I guess he was checking the lobby's on all the floors. Filling his pack. His version of buying groceries.

I stayed with Mama a whole week in the big Hospital. I spent a lot of my time watching her sleep or talking quietly with her when she was awake. I knitted things that I gave to the nurses who cared for her so sweetly and some doll dresses for my Granddaughter But mostly I worried about the invisible young man. I watched as he moved about the hospital unseen by anyone but me. He would take coffee from under the nose of people smoking outside and I even saw him walk past a table in the cafeteria once and after he passed the woman was looking all around on the floor for a banana. He could have taken some ones purse or wallet or other important things but he didn't. I watched him fill his cigarette pack from the ashtrays every morning and every night. Yet I never saw him ask for a cigarette. I felt as if I was as invisible while watching him as he was to the world that moved around the hospital. I wanted to offer him something. Maybe a meal or a few dollars but for some reason I felt that he would be embarrassed by my offer. I started buying a sandwich from the machine late at night and leaving it sitting on top of the trash can. Hoping he would find it still fresh for his breakfast. I left whole cigarettes for him in the ashtrays. I'd smoke one and leave one. I even put a clean Tee shirt in the lobby trash can and was pleased to see him wearing it the next morning.

It must be awful to be invisible out by the ashtrays. Where people plan extravagant dates and dinner parties and discuss new clothes and expensive pleasure trips. Never looking at the less fortunate ones around them.
I pray for my invisible friend every night now. Him and the many others like him. I pray that he has found a safe place to dream and a dream that will take him away from the streets!
Have a good night, remember to count your blessings; though they may seem to sometimes be few.
Patsy

Daddy's Dating Rules.

One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world.”~ Proverb

“Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla.”~ Jim Bishop

My Daddy was a kind and gentle man. He loved us all dearly. I don't know if he ever discussed dating rules with My brothers, I'm sure he did that privately with them. But to date one of his daughters could be a dangerous thing. Daddy had certain rules that he expected us to follow as young ladies and The boys we might date were expected to do certain things. First of all we were not to call boys at all. Back then it was considered "Ugly" for little girls to call boys. There were a few girls who would called our house to ask for one of my brothers. Most didn't call more than once. Mama always gave them the girls shouldn't call boys talk and most never called again. Boys could call us, If they didn't mind talking to Daddy first. I was in the second grade when the first one called me. I heard daddy ask him why was he calling.. Then after a brief pause Daddy told him well you call back in ten years son and he hung up on the young fellow.. I didn't ask who called or why.. At that point I didn't like boys anyway.

My oldest sister Trudy was the first one to reach the magical dating age of sixteen. One of our cousins had asked Mama and Daddy if She could go on a double date with a boy none of us knew. I remember Daddy telling them that he didn't mind If Trudy went on a date but that the Boy better come to the door.. No horn blowing .. That he would have to know who the boys "people" were.. Couldn't be No jail birds or jack legs. We weren't allowed to date those... If he had long hair Daddy knew a good barber.. Or Daddy had some dog clippers. Either suited Daddy. He was not to buy Trudy any gifts of clothing of any kind.. Any boy who bought you clothes either wanted to help you into the new ones or out of your old ones. and Both of those were a good way to meet Daddy's double barrel. She had to be home at a decent hour lets say eight pm. Seven, forty five was even better. When you bring her home You do not sit in the car in the dark in the yard! You do not put her out at the road. You pretend to be a gentleman and walk her to the door. At which point you Thank her for a lovely evening and get about the business of leaving. And Daddy's last rule and the one I personally never understood was.. Don't come to my house without your socks on. There was nothing Daddy hated more than a boy who wasn't fully dressed to go on a date and that meant SOCKS and shoes..

Well the day of the date came and the young fellow came along with my cousin and her date to pick up my sister. They all came to the door and Daddy let them in.. The young man began by taking of his hat at the door and offering Daddy his hand.. I was sitting on the floor in the dining room sneaking a peek at the young man who would be the first to date one of my Daddy's daughters. I thought he was doing pretty good so far. Daddy shook his hand and told them to come in.. His hair was neatly cut and combed into place. Mama was sitting in the living room along with Trudy. Sue and her date Mark came in and sat down.. daddy invited the other young fellow to sit as well. Then began the questions.. Where are y'all planning to go? What time are you planning to be back? Who is going to be driving? Who is your Grand-daddy? And on and on.. Finally daddy having decided that the boy was harmless stood and said " well y'all young folks better get on the road if Trudy is going to be home on time." I really though the young man had passed the tests. I think Daddy thought so too. They almost made it out of the house before the crazy boy messed up. He turned to Daddy just as they were about to leave and held up his foot. He had on his socks just as Daddy had said he should but he had them on with sandals. He said " And Mr. Black Look I wore socks just like you said." I saw the frown turn daddy's smile upside down as Daddy pushed the door shut in his face.. He looked at Mama and said "I ought to Call her back in here; You see what a smart Alec jar head he is.!" But Daddy didn't make her come back in the house.. She went on that date with him.. But she never dated him again. Later I learned that Daddy always gave us girls two things before we went on a date.. A dollar and a dime. The dollar was to buy yourself a drink if you accidentally got out of the house with a boy to cheap to pay for you a soda and the dime was to call Daddy to come and get you should you find yourself on such a date. And we were to call first and he would be there by the time we finished our soda. I feel that it was a lucky thing that neither of the four of us daughters ever had to use our dollar or our dime!

I guess it sounds like Daddy was a hard man. He wasn't. He just wanted us to be safe. He was going to see who we were leaving with. He was going to say a few words to them before we left. And he would be waiting up when we came home. Daddy was always nice to the young men who came to carry away his daughters. He just liked things to be a certain way.

Times have surely changed from way back then when Daddies met young men at the door. Daddies don't know who their daughters are dating any more. Girls call boys and think nothing of it. Girls will come to get the boy and will wear his clothes if she can get them. If there are any rules for dating the young people break them all. My children said I was out of style and old timey when they were here at home and dating. I just smiled at them and said.. "yea, well be glad you didn't belong to my Daddy!"

I laugh often when I think about the rules Daddy had for dating.. They really are funny. especially the rule about socks. But I'm glad my Parents loved us enough to try and keep us safe from the world. I felt the same about my kids.. I hope my son will feel the same about his daughter. And since I know how my son loves his children, I think socks will be the least of a young mans worry when he attempts to date my Grand-daughter. Thanks for sharing a smile with me tonight!
Have a great night!
Patsy