Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Never! NEVER! Never!

"Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never; in nothing, great or small, large or petty; never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense." ~ Winston Churchill

"I never think of the future - it comes soon enough." ~Albert Einstein

"There was never a genius without a tincture of madness. " ~ Aristotle

"Never complain. Never explain." ~ Katharine Hepburn

"Men who never get carried away should be." ~ Malcolm Forbes

"There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


How many times have you said Never? I have said I will never speak to them again. I have said I will never shop there again. Never eat that again. Never trust him or her again. And the list goes on and on. I could go on forever about all the things I have said never about.

I was never going to love any one but I did. I was never going to marry and have children. I was instead, going to be a career woman anywhere other than here and hopefully in a big exciting city. New York maybe or even Charleston, It even had Folly beach. But I definitely, certainly was NEVER staying here.

We all know how that turned out. Married at sixteen and three children and a divorce later I was never ever going to fall in love again. I even promised my children I was never going to marry anyone again. Yet where would me and mine be without him? He was never supposed to come along and make me forget to never love again but along he came with his two children to make our world complete.

I was never going to do so many things that I did anyway. I was never going to say things to my children that My parents said to me. Things like " No EVERYONE is not going away for the week-end because you're not!" or " NO EVERYONE's parents are not letting them get a purple Mohawk because your parents are not!" Then one day I was explaining something to ~(yelling at)~ one of the children and it dawned on me that I sounded just exactly like my own parents had way back then when I was making myself one of those never never promises.

One time when I was little Mama and Daddy had ventured off somewhere with the older children, leaving me, Jimmy, and Reuben with Grandma. He had hit me with a stick and scratched my leg. I was so mad at him. I didn't want a scratch on my leg! I was NEVER, NEVER, NEVER going to forgive him and I was going to be mad with him forever. He hadn't meant to hit me. He was throwing the stick but it had hit the ground and then bounced up and hit my leg but I didn't care right then. Grandma was sitting there holding Reuben and I had a scratch on my leg. I was mad at the world. I ran to her and told her I was never going to forgive Jimmy and I was never going to play with Reuben again and I was never going to be nice to anyone again. Never! And I hoped my leg fell off and NEVER grew Back on!

My Grandma Laughed at me! Man did that set me hot! I stomped around the end of the little white house and went up under the back steps and cried and promised myself I would NEVER forgive Jimmy nor Grandma nor even Reuben and especially Mama and Daddy because they left me there with her and Jimmy. I cried awhile but no body came around the house to check on me. I got worried then that Grandma might have been trying to come but fell down. Or maybe she couldn't come cause Reuben was sick. Or maybe Jimmy threw the stick and it fell and put his eye out!

I ran from under the steps and ran around the house but Grandma was still sitting out in the front yard. Reuben was tottering around close to her. Jimmy was still throwing sticks but had started throwing them at the azalea bushes now. They were not sick or hurt. They were ignoring me. I was Never going to forget that! I turned to run again but Grandma called me to her. She laughed at me again but before I could pull away she said to me " Patsy, Never is a long, long, long, time. Longer than we can imagine. Never say Never because never is like forever; Never, never ends." Than she patted my back and looked at my pitiful excuse for a scratch. It had somehow faded away to just a tiny mark. She sent me for the brush and brushed my hair and soothed my anger just by being who she was. I have always remembered her words. Every time I say I will NEVER do something I think about that day. I try not to say never very often Because everything I ever said Never about came to pass soon enough.
Today's poem is about Grandma's words to me that day. Have a great day. and Never say Never!
Patsy

Never Say Never!

"child"
she said
wrinkled hands
patting my back
her laughter ringing
"Never is a long time
longer when you're angry.
Tomorrow will be soon enough
For anger to end. But don't say
never. For never; never: ever ends!"

written by: Patricia Sawyer
12-2-2008

3 comments:

Big Time said...

Hey Patsy,

I couldn't tell you how many times I have said never too. Somehow, I forget though and do it anyway. Love you! Reuben

gengen said...

This is very interesting post. i can't also remember how many times I say never in one day. Wow!

Pblacksaw said...

Bigtime- I have said never so many times and then had to eat my words. you know words taste pretty good with salt and a little garlic?! Love you!

Gengen- I say Never rarely but even so I say it enough. And what ever I was never going to do.... I have already done .
Thanks for stopping by!

Patsy