Friday, June 5, 2009

For the "Kids" Friday!

"Art is like baby shoes. When you coat them with gold, they can no longer be worn."
~ John Updike

"Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth, but by washing away from it all that is not gold." ~ Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy

"Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold." ~ Mark Twain

"Gold that's put to use more gold begets."
~ William Shakespeare

Wow is it Friday already? This week has flown by. I would love to tell you of the adventures I have been on this week~ But I actually don't think I went on any. I spent last week end entertaining and that even carried over into this week some too.. I think I have had company every day this week.. Right now it is silent here except for the Thunder rolling across a distant sky. Silence is golden.

You will notice that all of the quotes today are about gold too. I chose them because first of all I liked them all.. secondly they each tie in with something wise I plan to share with the "children" today. Maybe some of my words will actually help someone someday. If not at least I can give a few people a pretty good reason to laugh on Friday! I hope you enjoy today's words of wisdom for the kids!

1:) Yes I know how much junk I have in my house! ~ I know how much it's worth too... Most of it is stuff that you or one of the other "children" left here... I am taking good care of it. I plan to leave it to you when I die instead of money! I will pull out your old report cards and share them with your babies when they get older... I will embarrass you when ever I like by showing everyone the naked picture of you brushing your teeth. I will Ooh and Aah over your gold plated baby shoes~ (that gold is fake so no need to try and pawn that after I'm gone! ) and your Graduation pictures. I will think of one you every time I dust this junk. I will plot ways to make you ashamed. I will search every time I think about it for something else that might just might be buried around here that you wouldn't want your friends or your wife to see.. Maybe I'll frame those pictures of the beautiful blue smocked dresses that my boys wore as infants. That should do the trick... and if Not then maybe we can sell all this junk on EBAY!

2:) A lie does not sound more convincing with an I love you Mom attached! ~ An I swear doesn't help either.... Don't you know that I watched as you struggled to tell me the first lie and I have learned how to tell them from the truth.. The best lies always have just a smidgen of truth in them but I hate lies.. Each of my "Children" know this. As bad as the truth can be I would rather hear it than some half cocked lie you made up on the way home from where ever it was that you did whatever you just lied about. Next time say.. "I love you Mom and I hope you don't kill me when I tell you the truth!" Another answer that works after you are eighteen is "Mom I'd really rather not say!" (or Aunt Patsy or Miss Patsy or whatever it is that you might call me!) I'm really easy to get along with.. I won't kill you but once.... If I asked you a question and you are planning to lie.. Don't I already knew the truth before I asked.. I'd be a great detective! Actually I might pinch you.. I used to hit kids but they say it's against the law to hit the little heathens now.. No body told my Daddy he couldn't spank us.. Man why did they wait till I was a parent to change that law?

3:) Don't make love by the garden gate~ Love is blind but the neighbors ain't! ~ Please do not be doing anything that the neighbors are going to tell on you for.... I will be really ticked if the crazy people I live by have a reason to complain about you! I promise that they are looking this way every time you do something stupid. I Know this because I have climbed on top of my house to see what all the racket was; coming from next door. I have crawled through the darkness to be sure no one was being killed by a crazy drunk neighbor man. Neighbors watch.. then they tell their half witted friends and everyone else that my kids are bad.. Do not make me......... You will not like it!

~By the way you can see quiet a long way from the top of my car port. I even saw one my own kids misbehaving once.. You did, of course, try to lie about it.. but at least you didn't hang the I love you on the end of your lie.. Instead you hung an "I would never ever ever do that!" on the end!

4:) Be all that YOU can be! Notice I said :"YOU"! You can't be what ever I might like for you to be.. I can't be the perfect Mom you wanted. I have done my best with what I was given. There were many times I wanted to give in and give up... I didn't. Now I think you should be the best that you can. Use your own talents to become what it is meant for you to be..That doesn't mean that each of you will reach the same heights.. You will not.. Each person is different... we can only accept each other for who we are... Even that is not easy to do. We as humans always think we know what is best for others. We do not... we each must march to the beat of the drums our own drummers play.. Mine plays a kinda jazzy; upbeat; half crazy: flowery; tune. With a few rooster crows tossed in for good measure. Even my shadow dances along with the wild beat sometimes!

5:) Dogs can smell meanness. ~ This is something that my Daddy always said and now I am sharing it with you. It is not simply an old wives tale. I have found it to be true. Over the years I have often had dogs that simply didn't like certain people. One example I can give you was Buddy and a kid we all called Little John.. every time Little John ever came here Buddy would growl at him. As kids go, I couldn't tell where John was any meaner than any other kid that came here. In fact compared to a lot of them he was a good kid. He never gave me any trouble.. never sassed back or did anything wrong that I could catch him at.. finally knowing that he was up to something no good because buddy growled at him all the time.. I made a new rule and began to tell all of them that they had to empty their pockets when they came here to spend the night.. The first night I lined them all up and Little John somehow made it to the back of the line... He was dragging his feet by the time it got his turn to empty his pockets... It didn't take me long to see why.. Man was that kid loaded.. he had three or four knives and a few other illegal things as well.. He said he didn't know who the drugs belonged to or how they got in his pocket... I smiled as he emptied his pockets and when Buddy lay down by his feet and quit growling I knew the kid was clean... I promised that I would return his weapons when he was leaving my house.. I told him since the other stuff wasn't his anyway, I'd just get rid of it for him.. I actually gave it to his uncle who called me and claimed it was his own.. He said the kid had stolen it... I felt sorry for any kid in that situation... He wasn't the only child I ever caught with things they shouldn't have had.. I just used him for an example... I also changed his name! (You didn't really think I would shame one of my "children" like that did you???) Over the years I have found many things in the pockets of kids who didn't need to have them.. from dip and cigarettes to switch blades and knives of all kinds.. I always returned to them what their parents allowed them to have and what was not illegal. If you are mean enough to bring contraband into my house I am mean enough to take it from you!!!! I keep dogs all the time.. If my dog doesn't like you.. I will watch you like a hawk... I will figure out why my dog doesn't trust you.. I won't trust you if my dog doesn't... And please don't kick or hit my dog when he is trying to tell on you.. You will not like the crazy me you see if you hit or kick one of my animals...I might even bite you and I have not had my rabies shots!

~ Tonight I have shared a few more bits of wisdom with the "kids". There are so many things I would like to tell my "children". My own and my step-kids and my nieces and nephews.. their little ones and the list goes on and on. I Have always had children around me from the very earliest days I can remember in my life. First was Reuben, (my baby brother) then Martha,
( My baby sister) and of course there were the foster siblings and the gazillion nursery children that Mama and later me and Trudy too kept in day care.. I will always love children... I will expect certain things from them. I will not hesitate to show them where time out is in my house even if they are just visiting.... Children must be kinda like dogs and have a sense that allows them to know that I am mean.. they behave here.. they don't dare me.... They almost always love coming to my house! Have a great Friday Night!!!



Sunshine said...

Thank you Patsy! I loved the post today! Can you vacation at my house this summer? I need a sitter who can make my kids walk the line!

PJ said...

there needs to be more of you in this world today. thanks for a great post!

Big Time said...

Hey Patsy,

I love you. And, that is not a lie. Reuben....

Pblacksaw said...

sunshine~ Kids today look at me like I'm crazy and they erase the line! Lol.. Glad you liked the post though.

PJ~ Thanks but I'm not sure the world could stand more of me..

Big Time~ I love you too.. And we never lie. I never thought to lie to daddy.. I think he would have known.

Thanks to all who visit me today!