I Survived the Week-End?!

“Wake up with a smile and go after life … live it, enjoy it, taste it, smell it, feel it”. ~ Joe Knapp

“The miracle is this – the more we share, the more we have”. ~Leonard Nimoy

"There is only one way ... to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making the other person want to do it." ~ Dale Carnegie

Wow It's Monday and I survived the long week-end with the visitors and the children and the friends and everyone.. I'm not even sure how I managed not to loose my temper even once... I wasn't drinking.. I didn't have a nerve pill... My tongue is still in one piece so I must not have had to bite that too much.... I had forgotten how loud people are.. Dave and I are very quiet.. I am almost always at home and when he is at work I am here alone.. Other than the few phone calls each day I am pretty much silent.. Well except when I read poetry aloud to see how a word sounds... or read from a story aloud to see if I need to change a word for a certain effect.. (Yes I know that sounds crazy.. I thought all of you already knew I was crazy?!) I do talk to the birds and chickens as I feed them.. I'll tell them no eggs means soup for supper.. Chicken Soup!!.. Sometimes they cluck and cackle as if they are talking back to me.. But all of my dogs barking and my chickens cackling together aren't as loud as a bunch of twenty year old men and three girlfriends...Two children.. and one more pair of adults...Friday night I wanted a cigarette and I haven't smoked in a long long time.. Thankfully everyone came and saw...and met.. and Saturday was pretty quiet.. Two young fellows came and helped Cooper pack.. Carly gathered things for the new puppy and got her own stuff ready for the trip home.. Dave grilled ...outside... taking Mason with him and I cooked the other things in the oven.. checking them now and then.. and sat down to write down a dream I had a week or so ago.. The writing sorta took over and wrote itself into a story.. a very short story though.. We all gathered around the table and had a wonderful meal together before the guys shoved off to Pursue a female of their own and Cooper and Carly finished the packing and loading of everything and finally around 8pm struck out for home.. <~~~~~~ >New Mexico... way across over there... 25 hours away.. as the crow flies....

I know this is not a usual type of thing for me.. I surely don't write dark stuff very often.. But sometimes I do.. This is one of those times.. Maybe you will enjoy it.. Maybe not.. Maybe you won't even catch on .. either way.. I am sharing it.. I am glad to have survived the week-end without blowing my top.. I am glad Cooper and Carly are home in New Mexico safe and sound.. I am glad my house is silent tonight except for the tapping of my toes and the keyboard keys..I am simply glad.. let me know if you enjoy the story or even if you don't.. I will welcome all comments.. I hope that today you too are Glad about something!..Have a great day!
Patsy


Forgive me Father...

The young Padre lathered his scratched and bruised knuckles.. The rusty red water swirled and slugged into the drain... He reached for the nail brush laying along the back of the old porcelain sink....Thirty nine times he would scrub his hands tonight.. One time for each of them that had gone away.. Mama had taught him to keep his hands clean... Mama had taught him many important things before she went away..

The blond news woman begged and pleaded from the tiny television in the bedroom behind him.. She was speaking on behalf of the family of a missing girl... Cynthia Louise some body... He had called her Diana.. He gave them all new names after they went away.. good clean names... Biblical names... The tiny television was balanced on the end of the bed.. He hated television but he liked to hear the pleas after another woman went away.. The bed was a small bed for a man of his size and age.. Hard.. with only a thin blanket and a worn and ragged pillow... There were no pictures on the walls.. The only adornment in the entire room was the big bible laying open on the oak dresser.. He had never liked fancy things.. Mama had told him fancy things were sinful...

Reaching for the snowy white towel the priest dried his hands and smothered the bruises with lotion.. There was no telling what germs those trashy women had on their bodies.. Diana had bit him and scratched him.. He didn't have time to even think of Mama this time... He had been proud of Mama when she went away.. Not one time did she scream or beg like some of the others had.. She had even looked him in the eye when he might have faltered and snarled at him to finish it!... There had been so many more since Mama....

He had been thirteen when Mama went away.. he hadn't known it was going to happen.. he hadn't planned for it to happen... Mama had just risen from his tiny bed and went to bath herself.. he had heard her singing hymns in the bathroom as she washed away the proof of their sins... The next thing he remembered mama was laying on the bathroom floor bleeding and he had been standing over her with blood dripping from his hands.. He would have left her there maimed but alive if not for her snarl.. "Don't be a girly boy! You finish what you started!" Three days later the police had shown up at their spotless house and finding him there alone and Mama no where to be found they had brought him here...

Hanging the towel to dry.. the Father glanced at his reflection from the small shaving mirror over the sink.. thirty eight years he had been here.. growing from a boy to a man.. a Priest...thirty eight women gone away.. all of them sinners.. they had confessed the vilest of sins to him.. Many of them seeming to almost enjoy the telling of their secrets.. sitting back in the darkness of the confessional as if he were a close friend who had shared in their wickedness... penance and absolution for the same wickedness over and over.. He chose carefully.. There was Ruth.... He had long since forgotten her real name.. guilty of adultery not once or even twice.. but seventy times.. He had freed her from her sins.. just as he had freed Mama and the others who had tried to seduce him and the other orphanage boys..and sometimes even one of the Priests here.... before he had become a priest himself just as soon as he possibly could.. No more hiding behind the confessional to hear whispered sins.. Now he sat in the comfort of the booth and listened carefully to the wicked confessors..

Sliding the television back into the dresser drawer the Padre smoothed his frock over his slim body and smiled at the small green light that flashed to let him know another sinner was waiting.. he wasn't in any hurry today.. he had a whole year to decide... slipping silently into the darkened closet he sat back and crossed his legs.. he could smell her perfume.. he was almost sure of who she was before he heard her speak... almost eighteen and the worry of her Parents..he had already forgotten her real name..

"Please say you'll Forgive me Father for I have sinned" .. she began... "and I haven't been to confession in at least fourteen days".. she added almost happily....."Ah yes!" he thought to himself with a sad smile.. twisting on his chair.. settling in for a long tale of daring misdeeds.... It was Miriam....

Written By: Patricia Sawyer
8-29-2009

Thursday! I Almost have this Week Whipped!

"The Constitution does not just protect those whose views we share; it also protects those with whose views we disagree."

"Do we operate under a system of equal justice under law? Or is there one system for the average citizen and another for the high and mighty?"

"I hope for an America where we can all contend freely and vigorously, but where we will treasure and guard those standards of civility which alone make this nation safe for both democracy and diversity."~ All By Ted Kennedy- 1932- 2009

1~} Edward M. Kennedy was born at Brookline, Massachusetts on 22 February 1932 and died at his Hyannis Port, Massachusetts home late on Tuesday night, 25 August 2009.

I was sleeping when my Television made an unusual toning sound that woke me up.. It was the "Breaking News Tones" I have only ever heard them a very few times so I knew something important or maybe even bad had happened... Ted Kennedy has died with Brain Cancer was the headline!

Born to a large; wealthy and powerful family, Teddy was the youngest of nine children. His three brothers all met violent deaths One brother, Joseph, died in world War 2. John and Robert were both assassinated. He won the US Senate seat his brother John vacated when elected president, at the earliest legal age of 30... a seat that he held until his death...President Barack Obama hailed Edward Kennedy as "the greatest United States senator of our time."

Even though his private life was undisciplined, marked by many affairs, drinking, and one never forgotten auto accident that nearly cost him his freedom as well as his political career... his performance in the Senate was always focused and effective. He was known for being among the most liberal of Democrats, and the Democrat most likely to Make a deal with Republicans to enact the legislation most important to him. He was a firm fighter for equal rights.. he was also working on the heath care issues before congress now.. He was also the Author of a children's book called.."My Senator and Me" that tells the tale of how a bill becomes a law.. The book is written from a dog's eye view.. One of His own dogs Splash..

Kennedy will lie in repose at the John F. Kennedy Library in Boston, Massachusetts. A procession on Friday, August 28, will travel from the library to the Our Lady of Perpetual Help Basilica known locally as Mission Church in the Mission Hill section of Boston, where a funeral mass will be held. The four living former Presidents, Jimmy Carter, George H W Bush, Bill Clinton and George W Bush will all be attending. President Barack Obama will deliver a eulogy. Kennedy will then be buried at Arlington National Cemetery near the graves of his brothers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2~} This has been a long and exceptionally tiring week.. It began early Monday with Dave and I going to Augusta to pick up Coop's car from the shop.. and bringing it home on the trailer.. when we carried it over there it rode smooth.. coming back I think they had it out of balance or something.. Maybe because the guy at the shop drove it up on the trailer and didn't have it in the right place.. I don't know.. I am a woman.. I know nothing about cars.. except for how to pump gas.. I am expecting Cooper sometimes late tonight along with his girlfriend, Carly, Who I have never met... I imagine I'll have a house slam full of young men and women from tonight late until when ever they decide to leave heading back to New Mexico.. They flew here but will be driving back.... I always hate it when my kids are traveling.. I am ill at ease from the time they leave till they get here and ill at ease again from when they leave here until they call me and say they are safely home.... Way over there on the other side of the country!... me<~~~~~~~~~~~> them .... and just so we are clear on this.. New Mexico is part of the United States! I am always surprise when someone asks me if it doesn't bother me that both of my sons have chosen to live in another country... I would laugh if I didn't find it so sad that grown people don't know any better than this....just today someone asked me how often I had to renew my permit to go to see my sons.. I managed not to laugh out loud.. I didn't even bother to explain to this person who I know to have graduated from college... I simply smiled and told him that I renewed my green card every year.. "WOW" he said " I thought they were good for longer than that!"... I have the bed sheets changed on both guest beds since Cooper says he's staying in his own room and I'm offering them the other room since it has a bathroom right there in the room.. I have cleaned and polished... I have chicken salad ( his favorite food!) made and even have some put into containers for him to drag home with him.. I rode the lawn mower, which relaxes me, until it was pitch black outside.. and Now here I am! Crazy and worried till they pull up outside.. His friends picked them up so they might be tomorrow morning getting here...... I bet this is weird for all of you who usually find me so funny.. I guess the secret is out.. I am a normal Mom.. I worry and wonder about my kids.. I get uptight.. Every once in a while I even loose it.... But not tonight!

3~} I have decided to share with you three Haiku even though I have already shared some info on Ted Kennedy and some personal thoughts.. I have been working on a series of Haiku that have birds as their focus.. the first one is from that series.. the second one is simply because I can't see a dandelion without making a wish as I blow... Maybe it's the little girl hidden deep inside of me?.. The third one is from a walk in the woods Dave and I once took with all the kids.. we came upon a bluebirds nest in a dogwood tree deep within the woods.. for those who may not know it.. a bluebirds call is called a cheer... I hope you enjoy tonight's Haiku! Please let me know if you like them or if you don't... Have a wonderful day!
Patsy

~~~~~~

The Warbler

yellow- rumped warbler
feeds from a spider's web
sun shines on the dunes

written by: Patricia Sawyer
6-23-2009

~~~~~

Wish

dandelion spores
scatter with a breath's wind~
I make a wish

written By: Patricia Sawyer
6-23-2009


~~~~~

Miracles

deep within the woods
a white dogwood blooms~
a bluebird cheers

written By: Patricia Sawyer
6-22-2009

Wednesday and It's full of Weird!

"Weird, strange, different and unique are all different shades of the same word. How you perceive an experience or individual will determine which shade of this word you use. Another person's perception may be entirely different," ~ Mr. Prophet

“I used to think that anyone doing anything weird was weird. I suddenly realized that anyone doing anything weird wasn't weird at all and it was the people saying they were weird that were weird.” ~ Paul McCartney

"Seven nurses and the baby has no eyes" which vaguely translates as "Too many cooks spoil the broth". ~ Weird Russian proverbs
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While looking for weird quotes today I came across a whole lot of weird.. Did I say WEIRD Laws.. I have most likely broke some of them with out even knowing they were laws... All of them are weird.. some of them are really weird and a few of them are plain Scary! I will be sharing a few of them with you today before we get to the weird questions!


Top ten Worldwide Weird Laws~ Number 7: Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or a piece of wood at all times. (A piece of wood?...a brick? In extreme cases do they cover with a board and set a brick on top of that?)


In California~

It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.

It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license.

Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet from a tavern,school or place of worship.

For some weird reason I thought killing whales was illegal?? All mice need to die.. I hate mice!.. and this third law.. Umm who regulates that? does it include the whales and the mice? And if they can hide so that they aren't seen publicly.. is it then legal? You folks in California are weird!


In Tennessee~

It's illegal to transport a skunk across state lines.

It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.

~ I am thinking this skunk law is obsolete! I wonder how many cars right now crossing the line coming this way have a hidden compartment with a fat skunk inside of it? I would like to see some cowpoke lasso a fish.. I think My brother Jimmy might be successful though.. He has roped a lot of things including people..

Now we move on to the weird questions.

1-]] Someone dares you to eat two cooked bulls testicles for 1,500 dollars. They're fried, topped with nacho cheese, lima beans and maple syrup and you have to eat it all. Are you going to eat it for the cash or pass? Do I really look that weird? My first husband once brought home some boar hog balls and although I refused he did clean them and cooked them himself.. He was so happily enjoying them that he convinced me to taste one.. It Tasted just like all other pork to me.. But bull testicles are huge.. they used to have some crazy weird show on Television where they ate all the weird animal parts.. I saw Bull testicles being ate on there once.. I'm not sure I could eat them even for 1500 $ .. How weird and broke does one have to be to eat weird stuff for 1500 $??.... I'm thinking I'm not quiet there yet.... besides I hate maple syrup so I guess I'd have to pass..


2-] ~ Strong in mind or strong in body? I am strong in Mind.. not quiet so strong in body.. Dave is strong in body.. You should see him pick me up when... Oh weird I almost told a secret... We are both actually kinda strong in body.. we work in the yard a lot.. Dave has a job that requires a great deal of strength in both areas.. When I worked at the hotel washing and folding the gazillion nasty bed sheets everyday I needed a strong body and sometimes a strong stomach.. I also needed a strong mind to tolerate the bosses and to work in the office dealing with those who sometimes came for a room... People are plain nasty... I guess we had a lot of weirdos who stayed there.. but if this weird questions means I can just choose one.. I'll choose strong in Body.. I'll improve my weak mind provided I have sense enough to know I need to.. I hate these weird either or questions.. who would want to be a super strong dum-bass or a super smart weakling? that isn't much of a choice.. Can I be weird and say a little of each please?

3-] ~ Where is your favorite places on the body to be kissed? Favorite places to kiss? Y'all know y'all are so delightfully weird trying to sneak a sexual question in like it's innocent... I have a few places I like to be kissed... Dave knows them all.. he found most of them before I knew I liked it.. I think that's way more info than anyone else needs since I don't plan on being kissed in those places by anyone other than Dave.. maybe I'll be weird one day and write them down for him just in case he might forget But for now.. Quit being weird! Places to kiss.. well that depends on who I'm kissing.. I will kiss my brothers on their cheek sometimes.. It's a dirty job but some one has to do it... I don't kiss brother-in-laws.. that would be way to weird.. those are the lips that kissed my sister.. in her good places.. Brrrr.. I kiss my kids on the head and the cheek.. when they were tiny I kissed their feet and hands too.. I know I'm a weird Mama.. I also kissed and snuggled their chins and necks and ears.. honestly I am not too big on kissing anyone who is not my lover.. and in my weird world that also means Dave!!!!! I have kissed my sisters on the cheek too.. I love them and could hug them to pieces but Kissing is special..

4-]~ Have you ever walked in on someone else having sex? How did you and the people involved react? This is so weird when it happens.. I had some family of a relative.. ( I know that is weird).. They came to town to hunt Deer and got drunk in a bar and called me to come there too.I went and wouldn't let them drive or go to their elderly Mom's house in that state.. So i being the good friend that I am brought the whole kit and caboodle home with me.. My kids were at their Dad's and I was at that time a single woman.. One guy was on the phone and another had walked outside with his lady he picked up in the bar.. The dad to these two guys was asking about the house and said he'd like a tour.. I knew what he was after but I was dating Dave.. It would have been weird to hook up like that anyway.. I proceed to take him on a tour and as we step into the kids room and I flipped on the light .. there they were.. One of the guys and his girl from the club.. he yelled at me to turn out the light and she hid her face.. She should have hid it in shame.. I was mad.. More than mad... I got weird ... The woman decided she might need to go quick.. I found parts of her outfit from here to the highway.. The guy just rolled over and closed his eyes and gave me a weird thanks... The Dad fell asleep sitting at the table with his coffee and the guy on the phone walked back to the bar and got their rented car and showed up here the next morning sober and ready to go hunting.. how weird does one have to be to get naked and find themselves in that predicament in some strangers house in her kids bedroom on a tiny crib mattress sized bed??? God, please If I ever even think of acting that weird and crazy.. please come on down here and get me!

5-] ~What birth control do you use? none.. old age.. I was spade almost twenty years ago.. And I thought that was fixed.. did Y'all know that the surgery is only guaranteed for five years??? When I was sick a couple of years ago they were doing all these tests on me and they kept asking when I last had sex... I told them they were weird and they made me watch a truly weird video about how the tubes come untied and grow back together.. I was about to come unglued... then the weird tests kept coming back inconclusive??? how can that happen.. I wanted them to do something to check mine.. they said I was weird.. Me weird.. Y'all ain't seen weird till I get pregnant at 50 years old!!!

6-] ~ Pretend you spent a busy day running errands and shopping... you come home in the afternoon when no one else is home. You come in, sit things down and head to the kitchen. You find a dead body laying in the kitchen floor. What would you do? This is truly one of the weirdest questions I have ever seen.. Is this person someone I know? Is it someone I might even want to see dead? (don't be weird we all have enemies..) Is it someone I might get accused of killing? Is it a fat man or a skinny woman? why are they in my floor? did they die naturally or did someone kill them? How did they get in my house? See there are way to many weird possibilities with this question..That is why I would bury them in the back yard.. No weird questions to answer and I can always plant daisies on top of them.. What did you think I was going to do? Call the police? .. I'm weird not stupid.. I'm not going to jail for some dead person I didn't kill.. unless of course it is someone I know and like and can plainly see died from natural causes.. In which case I will call a friend to help me move the body back to their own home after dark and then we will "find" them and call the police! This weird thing will never happen to me though.. no way am I going to be out all day shopping!

Wow the questions are weird.. laws are weird.. today has been weird.. this week has been weird.. Maybe I am just plain and simply weird!? Last night I had weird dreams.. I woke up this morning as my daughter was stepping into the kitchen and we had moved our bed.. she looked at my doorway and was looking me in the eye.. her foot step woke me up and for a weird second I forgot we had moved the room around.. and we both squealed.. that was weird.. Cooper is coming home for the week-end to get his car and bringing a girlfriend with him.. That feels weird too.. All my kids are grown and maybe now I'll really begin to do weird things... all the things I missed out on when I was young? I'm thinking I most likely won't... I'll just stay my old weird self and dig in the dirt and raise chickens... Have a delightfully; dizzying; weird day!
Patsy

An Artist's Birthday!

"The key to the mystery of a great artist is that for reasons unknown, he will give away his energies and his life just to make sure that one note follows another ... and leaves us with the feeling that something is right in the world."

"A work of art does not answer questions, it provokes them; and its essential meaning is in the tension between the contradictory answers."

"Life without music is unthinkable. Music without life is academic. That is why my contact with music is a total embrace."

"To achieve great things, two things are needed; a plan, and not quite enough time."
All from Leonard Bernstein, 1918 - 1990

I feel that I must mention that today is the birth date of Leonard Bernstein...

Leonard Bernstein was born at Lawrence, Massachusetts on this day in 1918. He was the first composer and conductor to be educated in the United States to receive acclaim and recognition worldwide.... By the time he reached the age of 25 he had brought a whole new kind of glory to the New York Philharmonic Orchestra.His exuberance and dramatic style caught the heart of America, bringing classical music to thousands of people from diverse backgrounds. More than any American conductor before him, Bernstein expanded the audience of classical music while maintaining a deep artistic integrity. He composed symphonic works and wrote the scores for many of the still popular musicals such as West Side Story, Candide and On the Town....
For On the Waterfront he received an Academy Award. He was simply adored by the public and a major social figure in New York. Although he was a man of many accomplishments he was proudest of his achievements as a teacher... He made classical music popular through a number of television appearances .. Including a series called "Young People's Concerts" that was shown on the Public Broadcast stations...

Bernstein died of on October 14th, 1990~ of pneumonia and a Pleural tumor only five days after his retirement.. According to the New York Times , he was "one of the most prodigally talented and successful musicians in American history."


You can actually listen to some of his music here... If you are interested... I was a little but surprised to find that he wrote the music for one of my favorites from way back.. Somewhere!

I personally love the last quote I have shared with you.. That almost seems to be the mantra of my own Life! Happy Birthday Leonard! And to my readers... Have a great day!
Patsy

Another Tuesday ~ Another what is it?

“For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh

“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.”

~ Buddha

“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.”

~ Washington Irving

I think I may actually have a plant this week that will be hard to guess.. I want to know what the plant is and what the fruit is used for... I am pretty sure you will be very surprised at what I have been growing.. The fact is that this fruit is believed by almost everyone to come from somewhere else.. Most people are not aware that it grows on a vine.. It is sold in specialty shops and many times cost a pretty penny.. I am rather fond of them and use them in several different spaces in my house and even outside in the back yard.. Can you guess what I am growing here?

The first picture is how these things look when they grow.. Their dark green leafy vines will reach for the sky.. climbing anything it can wrap a tendril around and hang on as it climbs over and under and around everything in it's path.. That is of course provided that it has plenty of water.... The vine will grow quickly up and over an old fence or even up into a tree.. Before long you will see hummingbirds swarming around the lemon yellow flowers that cover the tops of the vines.. Bees and butterflies will try to sneak a drink of the nectar but the hummingbirds will fight for every drop..chasing the bees and butterflies away every time they see one

anywhere near the vine.. The second picture is of two that I picked last year.. I saved these two for seeds.. I meant to plant them this year but at the beginning of the year I forgot about them.. I really think some of you may be surprised at just what these things are... I know I was when I was first given the seeds.. It sorta looks like zucchini squash doesn't it? I have been told that it is actually edible and quiet tasty.. Being that I now know what it really is.. I'll just pass on eating any of it.. you can have my portion..My friend Thoi does eat them.. she grows them for what they are and to eat.. The vines cover her small yard like a jungle...I will say that she eats them long before they get this big though.. The one in the first picture is quiet obviously being grown for what they become.. not for food... Can you guess what this strange plant is?

a few fast facts~

1~) the vines grow to at least twelve feet and many grow up twenty feet or even higher.
and will have dozens of fruit per vine.. the leaves and vines are crushed and used for an insect
repellent...

2~) the fruit is edible.. I googled it and their are even recipes on-line for it..
The flowers are also edible and are dampened then very lightly floured and fried for a delicious treat.

3~) It has large bright yellow flowers.. both male and female flowers.. the male flowers are found in clusters while the female flowers will stand alone..

4~) it is a fast-growing annual found wild in India and now cultivated in much of Asia.

5~) This warm season plant is sensitive to frost. It yields well in warm climates. The plant prefers deep well drained sandy loam soils, rich in organic matter with a pH ranging between 6.5 to 7.5. But it can also be grown on any good soil. The soil may be prepared well by adding organic matter or animal manure a few weeks before planting.

Did the fast facts help at all? I bet they didn't.. this is one of those things that either you know or you don't.. I'm thinking that a lot of you will be surprised when I tell you tomorrow exactly what I have growing in these pictures.. Some of you might even like to have a few seeds.. Please feel free to guess if you know or think you know the answer.. I love comments so you can comment just to say howdy if you want to too..

Have a wonderful day!
Patsy


Update~yes the plant is a loofah squash.. Or some people call it a gourd... Most people think that Loofah is a sponge that comes from deep within the ocean. It is often sold as a deep sea sponge.. especially by those people who set up shop in the center of the local mall and who also sell the salt they claim comes from the dead sea .. They have instructions on how to use it to cure every skin ailment known to mankind.. I have grown Loofah for a few years.. I got my first seeds as a gift from my Thailand friend; Thoi.. She eats hers.. I use mine to wash dishes and scrub pots and wash the car and the face and to wash vegetables.. They are pretty useful. They are also expensive to buy.. I saw a basket in one of the mall shops that had one thin slice of Loofah, a tiny vial of cleansing solution, and another tiny vial of dead sea replenishing gel.. The basket I could hold in the palm of my hand.. wrapped in Plastic and tied up with a green bow... the gift basket was $34... I wanted to come home and start seeds right then even though it was still cold outside.. These Squash get Long.. Really long.. as thin as that slice was... I could get rich if I could slice and sell mine like that.. Thanks to all who guessed!
Patsy

I Am Honored to be Awarded again!

"The creations of a great writer are little more than the moods and passions of his own heart, given surnames and Christian names and sent to walk on Earth."
~ William Butler Yeats


"Life is a train of moods like a string of beads; and as we pass through them they prove to be many colored lenses, which paint the world their own hue, and each shows us what lies in it's own focus."~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


J'Adore tien Blog!!
This phrase means I love your Blog~ in French!~ Cool!

I am tickled and honored to be once again chosen by a fellow blogger for an award.. Beckie from over at Basically Becky has given me the J'Adore tien Blog award... Thanks Becky! I am always amazed when I get an award of any kind.. I love praise.. I'd be a liar and a dummy if I said otherwise.. I don't expect for people to give me awards for what I love doing.. I am happy if I have just one comment on a day.. I write because it's who I am and part of what makes me breath.. I am always amazed and proud when someone else enjoys my work..

The best part of this and most awards, is that I get to pass it on to some of my own Favorite bloggers... Here are the rules:

• Copy the image above.
• Pass the award on to the bloggers you feel deserve it. You can pass it on to as many or as few bloggers as you want. There is no set number on this one.
• Leave a message or a comment for the bloggers you give it to, notifying them of the award.
• Leave a comment on the blog of the person who gave the award to you.

I read a lot of blogs. Some times My husband thinks that's all I ever do....He thinks that I blog and read blogs and drop cards and farm on Facebook.... I am a super multi- tasker too.. I can read a couple of blogs while clothes wash and another two or three while they dry.. I read a lot of blogs on a regular basis.. some I read every day... others I read when they have a new posting..

I will be passing this award to the following people..

1~) Theresa one of my first read blogs .. I have been reading her since I first discovered blogging~ at A Bumpy Path!

2~) Mike The newest blog I have began reading daily - I like a man who thinks!
~ at Thoughts on Life!

3~) Lin who always has something fun and interesting to say - Plus I love her cats..
~ at Duck and Wheel with String!

4~) Buzzing J who says he puts his fuzzes and buzzes into words on his blog..
~ at A Piece of Brick for a piece of Jade!

5~) Wanda who always has the greatest recipes.. I can get hungry just looking at her page..
~ at 1 Blog and 2 Sides!

Please take the time to visit these blogs if you have never been to them.. I recommend every one of them.. I could go on and on but I won't.. I am satisfied that eventually everyone who receives it will pass this award on until everyone who deserves it has it displayed on their page.. Thanks again Becky for the Honor you have given me!! Have a wonderful day!

Patsy

Well~ Surprise ME!

"A story to me means a plot where there is some surprise. Because that is how life is - full of surprises." ~ Isaac Bashevis Singer


"A sudden bold and unexpected question doth many times surprise a man and lay him open."
~ Francis Bacon


"A true leader always keeps an element of surprise up his sleeve, which others cannot grasp but which keeps his public excited and breathless. " ~ Charles de Gaulle




Today I was pleasantly surprised to be given the Loyalty award By the great folks over at West Virginia Backroads..

Loyalty is something that is rare these days.. I have a few loyal friends.. I am loyal to more people than I feel are loyal to me.. I am not complaining; I just face the facts about how life really is.. People are too busy and too caught up in their own dramatic lives to really give more than a passing thought of the lives of other people.. They don't mean to discard our lives and problems.. it's just that they have so many of their own.. If you have a loyal friend you should count yourself very lucky...

“An ounce of loyalty is worth a pound of cleverness.”~ Elbert Hubbard

“When we are debating an issue, loyalty means giving me your honest opinion, whether you think I'll like it or not. Disagreement, at this stage, stimulates me. But once a decision has been made, the debate ends. From that point on, loyalty means executing the decision as if it were your own.”~ Colin Powell

“Lack of loyalty is one of the major causes of failure in every walk of life” ~ Napoleon Hill

Looking for Loyalty quotes I found a great many of them.. It seems that almost everyone worth quoting has at least one loyalty quote.. From Anne Landers to Winston Churchill to Stephen King.. each has said something quotable about loyalty..

The dictionary describes Loyalty as follows~

1.	the state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

2.	faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.

3.	an example or instance of faithfulness, adherence, or the like: .

Following these guidelines I do know a few people who I would consider loyal.. I know or know the families of a few soldiers fighting in Iraq or Afghanistan right now.. to me that is one of the ultimate forms or loyalty to this country.. Actually I think any military personnel has to have that same loyalty as they could be called on to die for the rest of us at any time.. I know people who are loyal to their jobs and to their clubs or organizations.. I do my best to be loyal to my family and friends.. and to my Poetry group.. I thank everyone who is loyal to reading this blog and sharing my wild ideas and laughter! With that said I now pass tthis award to the following people~

1~) The wonderful folks over at Split rock- I love their Llamas
http://splitrockranchllamas.blogspot.com/

2~) To the great folks over at the Curly Cats - I love the cat tales! http://daisythecurlycat.blogspot.com/

3~) To A Lil enchanted- I love your outlook on life and things that go bump in the night! http://alilenchanted.blogspot.com/

4~) To Pj's Prose- I think we must be twins.. I thank you for you loyalty! http://pjtangel.blogspot.com/

5~)I Love the recipes anf great food at Cinnamon and Spice! http://cinnamonspiceandeverythingnice.blogspot.com/

I could think of another hundred blogs who each and all deserve this award.. I know I'm only allowed five but at least I know that each of these will choose five more and so on and so on.. eventually all of my choices will have been covered! Please visit these sights.. I am sure you will become loyal fans of them just as I have! Have a wonderful day!
Patsy

Friday and I am here again worrying the "kids"!

"Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl."
- Ernest Hemingway

"Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish."
- Ovid, 43 BC - AD 17

"Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense."
- Robert Frost
This is a picture of some of my many "KIDS!" I am here...as is my beloved and several generations of Kids.. we are playing a game.. I taught them this crazy game.. Strut Miss Lucy!.. maybe some day you will be lucky enough to play with us!

I wonder if any of the "kids" even read this blog? I have a good idea that my own kids don't.. They would say they don't have time.. I do know some of the "kids" I used to torment as they grew up~ even though they aren't truly mine~ do read it though so for now I'll still offer some Friday advice to you all.. Maybe It will give you something to think about and chuckle over during the long boring days of your week-end!

1-)~ You are a brat!.. I too was a brat until long after you were born.. Your father is still a brat as is your step- father and most men in general.. I am allowed to call you a brat because I helped make you into one.. It wasn't easy.. it took me and your Grand- parents and Aunts and Uncles a lot of years to make you into the brat you have become.. Now we will neglect you and begin to work on the bratty-ness of your children.... they will be even better brats than you can imagine.. so Now is time for you to start learning to deal with it.. they will whine and beg for things you don't want them to have and some of us will find a way to gift them with the very thing you despise... We will be telling them how awful you were as a child and as a teen... you won't have a leg to stand on.. it is also against the law for you to hit, yell at or otherwise control the natural freedoms of any child.. You might want to re-think the whole children idea and just continue to be a brat yourself!
Be sure to let me know what you decide.. I need to clean out some junk I was saving as evidence against most of you..

2-)~ I will be calling you by what ever name is on my lips when I spot you sneaking around.. If you are female I will call you Martha, Mary, Phoebe,Jenny, and any other person who is not you... I will call all males by the names of Reuben, Frank, Higgins, Ralph.. and finally I will point at you and yell .."Don't take another step ~ YOU!".. If you are the only one close enough to be the one I'm trying to call your best bet is to answer to what ever name I call you.. My Grandma did it.. My Mama only rarely does it so It might have skipped a generation... I do it and you know it.. So If call you Ralph and your name is Sheri.. You better say "yes mama!" You know I'm talking to you when you try to sneak into a house at two am and your curfew was midnight.. Don't walk on as if you are not Sarah Jane Ralph Reuben~ YOU! Jeez ~ No wonder you're such a brat.. your own Mama don't have sense enough to know your name!

3-)~ Go for a balloon ride, over Rome, while eating a Corn dog.... Sounds silly doesn't it? But doesn't it also sound fun? exciting even? ... I always wanted to go for a hot Air balloon ride.. I came close once upon a time.. We were at the Chittlen Strut in a little town called Sally.. everyone else was enjoying the carnival... I had stood in the three hour line for Grandma's chittlen plate and had met the mad man who ran the Hot Air balloon rides.. He and I had talked it over and he was going to let me ride for free as a filler... I wasn't sure what that meant but I was willing to do it just to ride.. needless to say My ex didn't take kindly to #1~ I talked to some strange man while I waited on his mama's stinking chittlens.. and #2~ riding in a hot air balloon was just crazy.. what was he supposed to tell the kids if I died..? That I had gone for a balloon ride over Rome while eating a corn dog? I didn't ride.. I have never ridden though I have always wanted too..It's on my bucket list of things I hope to do someday! I hope that my ex was thinking of me and was frightened for my safety..... Nah.. he was just being a brat! The point I am making is that sometimes you have to do something that you want to do... even if it's dangerous... even if it seems crazy to me.. you don't however need to tell me about it if you know I'll have a fit... Even though I outgrew the brat stage.. I can still be a crazy woman.. I have been known to pitch a pretty ugly fit at times..

4-)~ Cry! yes I said cry.. tears are cleansing to the spirit and to the soul.. they also wash the dust and dirt from your eye sockets.. I have seen grown men fight to stand tall and strong and after a while they forget to feel.. they forget to comfort.. they become hollow and then they break.. On the other hand please don't become a cry baby whining and complaining about every trial you must face.. we all have them.. They are a big part of life.. It is not UN-manly to cry.. Just do it and get it over with and then fix the situation.. And girls you too have permission to cry.. and once you are done.. call me we'll hunt down the man who made you cry and we'll... Oh wait.. that is a different story.. and girls wash your face first.. I once scared the be-Jesus out of myself by looking in a mirror after I had been crying.. I looked like a wet raccoon.. Emotion is natural.. crying is also natural... some people cry when they are happy some when they are sad.. I cry both of those times and when I am MAD!!! so If I'm not smiling through my tears and you are sure no one has died.. RUN!!!

5-)~ Every body has a story~ Don't be to quick to judge.... It is better to trust wrongly that to judge unfairly.. an example.. The young woman sneaked into the small building and opened the freezer as she looked around cautiously..she had planned ahead and knew that no one would be at home.. watching the long drive she felt around with one hand and grabbed the first thing her hand closed on.. tossing a jar of home grown butter beans into her bag she ran for the safety of the woods.. Now let's see... she just broke into someones building and stole stuff.. lets lock her up and throw away the key... or lets follow her through the woods to the little house where she lives with her elderly Mother-in-law and a small child... wait.. there are no lights shining in her windows.. she has no electricity... but we see her.. she is bending over a fire.. she is going to cook and eat that food she stole.. How awful she is.. But by the time everyone else is fed the pot is empty... she cries there by the fire.... let's lock her up and throw away the key???
Yes people steal... and it is rare that people steal to feed their children or to eat.. Most thieves steal to support a habit.. and sadly that habit is usually drugs.. But not everything you hear about other people is true.. I once knew a girl who everyone thought was ~what back then was called ~ a strumpet.. now she would be called promiscuous.. the truth was that she was neither.. she had rejected a young man and he had told all his friends that they had had wild and crazy sex... Not to be out done by their friend the other guys had also claimed to have slept with her.. She was innocent but no one believed her... stories get told and re-told and twisted.. be your own judge of a person by what you see in them .. trust only what you know to be true.. for if I judged all of my "children" by the stories told to me.. I wouldn't speak to any of you brats!! Give people a chance.. some of them will need more than one chance.. be generous.. but not stupid.. we all make mistakes but if someone makes the same mistake ten times.. It's a habit... I raised smart brats.. you'll know the difference!

Wow! I managed to get this blog post finished and let me tell you it has not been easy.. I have had a dog whining and a phone ringing and I was about ready to spit nickles when Dave called to say leave a door UN-locked for him.. I think I was rude and ugly to him.. I will of course have to apologize.. I am a lucky woman.. he has helped me raise the Brats... his.. mine.. and all the strays..
never once complaining about whatever kid needed school clothes or shoes.. even when the kids were not our own.. He answers what ever name I call him.. I always call him baby.... he would have said "hell yea lets get a corn dog and go for a hot air balloon ride"...and he gives everyone a chance and another and another..Yep I am lucky to have him..

The storm I had hoped for is now raging outside and threatening to shut down my computer.. I am not complaining.. I have jars that need filling with food.. I am always happy when it rains.. I hear frogs singing in the kiddy pool filled with goldfish, on my patio... with the thunder and the rain it sounds like a symphony to my untrained ear! Have a wonderful night .. I will be thinking of each and every one of you ~" My Kids"~
with Love!
Patsy

Three for you today.. it's Thursday!

"Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for."

"Don't keep a man guessing too long, he's sure to find the answer somewhere else."

"Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from."

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."

"It's not the men in your life that matters, it's the life in your men."

"Save a boyfriend for a rainy day, and another, in case it doesn't rain."

"When women go wrong, men go right after them."
All from Mae West, 1893 - 1980

1~) I missed Mae's birthday on August 17th.. I guess I was battling the modem on that day..
No one knows for sure what year she was born since her stage name has different dates depending on what role she was playing at the time.. She was the highest paid woman in the world in 1935.. earning almost $481,000.. She was a very talented actress and writer.. she wrote or co-wrote almost all of her roles. Once writing a play called "SEX" for which she was arrested...she could have paid a fine and avoided jail but thinking it might be an adventure she chose jail.... she was racy and considered to be a bit too naughty for main stream back then. She was nothing like most women and she made sure everyone knew it... She made remarks both on stage and in life that had hidden sexual tones and double meanings.. She neither smoked nor drank... she believed in equality between men and women and is considered to be both an entertainment legend and an American legend. She earned a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.. Her star is located at 1560 Vine Street.

2~) An Acrostic Poem.

Life

Little moments; big ideas; grand schemes and flops!
Intimacies shared; secrets held; pennies saved in a box.
Friends laughing; enemies kept close; bills; brooms and Mops.
Every breath a different thing; a rose; a bird; or an Ox!

Written BY: Patricia Sawyer
8-20-2009


3~) a riddle- Big as a biscuit, deep as a cup, even a river can’t fill it up. What is it?



I hoped and hoped for rain today.. Thunder and lightening circled around and around overhead covering the sky with a blanket of blackness... even now I can hear a distant rumble as the clouds roll away from us.. No rain so far for my garden.. I guess I'll water a little bit tomorrow morning..My newly planyed peas and beans are growing pretty fast.. we are hoping for one more late crop of veggies this year.. I still have empty jars..

I am so glad to have a modem that hasn't dropped off line even once today..I have caught up on my e-mails.. I was so happy I even read some of the ones that are always showing up in my spam folder.. I farmed a little in Farmville and worked at the factory in Yoville.. and played mafia wars on both facebook and myspace.. I wrote some poems and worked on a poetry class on Allpoetry.com.. I said I wasn't taking any more but I am fond of acrostic poems.. I shared one with you tonight.. It is for that class.. don't be fooled though.. those classes are hard.

I won 16th place in the poetry contests that I talked about a week or so ago.. the one where I submitted the poem called My Song... I was kinda sad till I realized that there was a gazillion entries... for the number of entries.. (thousands actually) 16th place was pretty good.. especially since I had never ever heard of that kind of poem.. ( a solfege) and wrote mine just off the top of my head.. Sometimes that's the best way to write..

Looking at the riddle I just realized that the answer may be hard for some of you modern folks.. the answer is actually rarely used any more and may be a complete mystery to many young people.. Maybe someone will be old enough to know what it is though.. Please leave me a comment if you know and even if you don't have a clue.. I'll be sure to let you know the answer tomorrow! Have a wonderful day!
Patsy

Wednesday Weirdness Quickly!

"The Aztecs believe they started up in what's now New Mexico, and wandered for 10,000 years before they got down into where they are now, in Mexico City. That's a weird legend. "
~ Jerry Pournelle

"The last show we played, I was straight as a die. It did feel weird not to be hiding behind alcohol or dope, but being focused was... good. " ~ Ron Wood

"The scientists at the end of the 19Th century had people coming to them with this weird behaviour, and they didn't know what was going on but there seemed to be a similarity. They needed an answer, so they made up one. " ~ Chester Brown

Hi and welcome to a whole week of weirdness.. So far I have survived through Wednesday. I have tricked and connived and fooled my wore out.. broken down.. needed a beating with a hammer... modem this whole week.. I was getting my gumption up to call the technician back and give her a good tongue lashing when I thought I heard the brown truck coming to my ( and her) rescue... Running to the door.. I was thankful to see Mr. UPS jump from his brown chariot with my box held out in front of himself like a peace offering.. He will never know how happy I was to see him.. I wasted very little time getting my new modem UN-boxed and hooked up.. I am happy to report that I have been happily computing ever since.. There was that first five minutes when I had a red light and then finally a blink and a flash and a message to please click here to install my new modem.. I guess you can see that it takes very little to make me happy... I am in fact so happy that I have decided to try and get in a quick Weird Wednesday post before I head off to bed.. He we go with the weird questions..

1~} Would you consider swapping with another couple? swapping what? cars? clothes? houses? Oh wait I think I know.. you're trying to ask me one of those truly weird questions that I can't answer aren't you? Actually I can answer this one for you.. I would never consider it because I don't play that! I am weird in that I married for better or worse and if they said anything about swapping I missed that part.. I am way! way! way!!! to jealous for that.. I'd scratch some bodies eyes out.. Let me find my hammer! See you started tonight off with making me mad.. How weird is that...

2~} If the love of your life was a different religion from you, would you convert for them if they asked you to? Wow, as weird as it may sound... I have actually thought about this situation before.. I know some folks who are married to someone of a different faith.. For me religion is a spiritual thing.. I would as weird as you may think this sounds.. NOT convert just because some one asked me to.. I guess I could be weird and pretend I had converted to make my love think I had and make them happy.. but I would know it was a fraud.. eventually they would see through me and my fake religion... I would be willing to learn all I could about their faith and would respect their rights to their own belief.. I would hope they would also respect my rights too.. Of course my life follows a weird pattern and it would be my luck to find a great Love who walked away not because or religion but because I believed the sea was blue and he believed it was green! I have to tell you though that I don't really discuss religion much with others... I disagree with many of the practices of organized religions.. God is real to me... though I would call it spiritual more than religious... I am Southern Baptist born and raised but I am not a regular Church goer.

3~} How many people have naked or semi-naked pictures of you? How weird! I guess it's possible that some one made a baby picture of me naked in a tub or something.. I have never seen one though and I really don't think my Daddy would have allowed that.. So I am going to say NO One has even seen naked pictures of me.. let alone have some...I was photographed in the hospital a few times though and we all know how weird those gowns are.. I was semi-naked in those.. it's weird but everyone is semi-naked in those gowns... I reckon someone might have one of those weird old photo's and therefore they might have a semi-naked picture of me.. You know as weird as it may sound I am semi-naked in almost all of my pictures.. I am almost always shoe-less.. that means NAKED FEET! that would be semi-naked! Maybe I'm weird.. maybe I like being shoe-less, semi-naked.... Wow I am weird! In fact I am being weird right now because here I sit at my computer.. semi-naked.... Bare footed! Weird huh?!

4~} Do you ever multitask while driving? What do you think of others who are guilty of it?
I never multitask while driving if I can help it.. I hate for my cell phone to ring while I'm driving.. IF someone else is with me I ask them to answer the phone... if I am in heavy traffic I let it ring.. I have answered it if I was at a stop sign or in a spot with no traffic around.. I passed a woman the other day that was reading from a page that looked like some form letter.. she was reading into a cell phone that was tucked under her ear.. her head cocked to the side. I wondered if she could see the road and traffic clearly with her head all weirdly twisted that way..I was scared when I saw her.. wouldn't it be weird to get run over and the last thing you see as you look around is a woman with a weirdly twisted head.. shouting into thin air and shaking a paper in the air while driving 40 miles an hour down the four lanes? I try not to mutitask while driving.. I think that driving should be done as a single task....It's safer that way for all of us!

5~} Would you/Have you ever dated someone who had a criminal record? ~ I have dated someone with a criminal record.. I won't go into details.. Many of us have secrets that we might not want told...But the truth is that I have dated more than one weirdo... and they didn't even have criminal records..... I even dated a counterfeiter once with out knowing it.. had I known it I mighta had a few extra dollars... I dated several people who had been arrested for pot... one was even arrested in Greece... Now you have to say that is weirdly cool! in a crazy sort of way... and back in the day that was even super cool.. arrested in Greece for hash.. and him just a regular fellow too not a dealer or a importer of drugs or nothing.. Ok I am not saying that drugs are cool.. they are not cool.. I'm just saying that yes I dated some weird guys and they had records.. well some of them did.. a couple of them did.... I dated them I didn't keep them.. don't be soooooo weird....

I think though that weido's like me.. not just weirdo guys either.. weird kids love me.. they google and gurgle at me in the grocery store and in the check out line at Wal-mart.... weird women like me too.. they will start talking to me in the library or the waiting room at the doctor.. and the weird Old folks.. they love me to death they call me shugaaa and Hon... They love me because I will fix them hot tea and sit with them...while they munch on stolen M&m's.... I will hold their hand in the Churchyard or when I see them in the bar... I won't judge them in either place... Maybe that is why they Love me so.. I don't judge them and I pray they don't judge me!!!

I hope you have enjoyed tonight's weird questions for today's second post!! I hope that my Modem will quit being weird now and behave for a long while...I was about to become a weird old woman with no internet! I was even beginning to scare myself...I even thought about the library but I knew 45 minutes would just be long enough to make me mad... I am soo far behind on things I do.. I'll catch up! Have a great weird DAY!
Patsy

Happy Birthday Ogden Nash!

"I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm."

"The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control."

"I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has income and she is pattable."
All from Ogden Nash, 1902 - 1971

Frederic Ogden Nash
Born: August 19, 1902
Rye, New York
Died: May 19, 1971
Baltimore, Maryland
American poet and writer

Ogden Nash was one of the most successful English-language poets of the twentieth century.

Nash grew up in various East Coast communities and even lived in Savannah, Georgia, during his youth. He attended St. George's School in Newport, Rhode Island, and he was accepted to Harvard but dropped out after barely completing a year.

Nash held a variety of odd jobs but was unsuccessful at all of them.. He worked on Wall Street as a bond salesman. He sold only one bond—to his godmother—and instead of getting out and trying to sell more he spent his afternoons in movie theaters. He was a schoolteacher for a year at St. George's School, and from there he was hired as an advertising copywriter for streetcar signs. In 1925 he was hired in the marketing department of the Doubleday publishing house and did well enough that he moved on to its editorial department as a manuscript reader.

In 1930 Nash wrote a poem called "Spring Comes to Murray Hill" and submitted it to the New Yorker, one of the most respected, well-read magazines of the day. Nash had thought up the poem while looking out his office window and thinking about his own life. The New Yorker published the poem and invited Nash to submit more; his appearances in the magazine led to a contract for his first work, Hard Lines, published in 1931. It was a success, being printed seven times in its first year alone. Nash quit his Doubleday job.

During the 1930s and 1940s, Nash's poems continued to appear in magazines and published collections. He was considered one of America's greatest humorists . He was very successful at expressing disbelief and dismay at the every day problems of modern American life. He criticized religious preaching and politicians that he considered to be filled with self importance. He referred to himself as a "worsifier" instead of a "versifier." His work was often criticized for taking liberties with spelling and rhyme. One example is the line: "If called by a panther/Don't anther."

In 1931 Nash married Frances Rider Leonard, and had two daughters. His zest for being a Father provided more subject matter for him and in 1936 he published a collection of poems called The Bad Parents' Garden of Verse. Nash also wrote screenplays for three Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer films—The Firefly (1937), The Shining Hair (1938), and The Feminine Touch (1941). While in California he met another well-known writer, S. J. Perelman (1904–1979), who had written for the Marx Brothers films. They worked together on a musical, One Touch of Venus. It was a grand success on Broadway in 1943.

Nash was elected to the American Academy of Arts and Sciences and National Institute of Arts and Letters. During the 1950s he wrote more often for the children's market. The Boy Who Laughed at Santa Claus (1957), Custard the Dragon (1959), and Girls are Silly (1962) , all of them great sellers. He also wrote for television productions of Peter and the Wolf and The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Hewrote about his experiences of babysitting his grandchildren. After suffering various illnesses in his later years, he wrote a number of poems about the medical establishment that were later collected in 1970's Bed Riddance: A Posy for the Indisposed.

Nash died on May 19, 1971 from Crohn's disease . Several collections of his work were published after his death, including I Wouldn't Have Missed It (1975) and A Penny Saved Is Impossible (1981).

The Firefly
by: Ogden Nash

The firefly's flame is something for which science has no name
I can think of nothing eerier
than flying around with an unidentified glow on a
person's posteerier.


The Termite
by:Ogden Nash

Some primal termite knocked on wood
And tasted it, and found it good!
And that is why your cousin May.
Fell through the parlor floor today!

I felt I had to mention the birthday of Ogden Nash today.. He became famous for his quick humor and strange wit.. for his ability to take the facts of real life during hard times and make them funny... I personally liked his saying pertaining to Ice breaking of "Candy is Dandy; But Liquor is quicker!" I guess it's true.. once you are about half drunk~ everyone is your friend..

I was surprised that I managed to sneak another post by my cranky modem.. For some reason it has only blinked it's red eye at me a few times today.. But Thankfully The wonderful Ups Man Just dropped off the new Modem.. Hopefully I will be back to normal soon! Have a great day!
Patsy

I'll Be Back!

"Life stinks, but that doesn't mean you don't enjoy it."
~ Dustin Hoffman

"The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire."
~ Dave Barry

"Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping."
~ Bo Derek


I wonder if anyone noticed me not being here? Maybe not... but just in case I am going to attempt to make a quick post before this crazy DSL modem flashes; then blinks off and on; and turns red all around. It drives me completely insane. I want to take it outside and lay it out on a cement slab and beat the crap out of it with a hammer... give it a good reason to blink and flash it's lights at me... See I told you.. Completely insane...

It might not be so bad if Tech support could offer me some tidbit of helpful advice or might say they were having DSL trouble in my area.. I try desperately not to call them.. I restart the computer and restart the Modem even though God knows it restarts itself every five minutes...
Or even sooner if it catches me trying to do anything important or maybe it will let me get almost a whole poem wrote before it wipes me out... It hates me I think!..And NO I am not going to be playing any games of any kind that will automatically cause it to restart.....

I have everything that can be disabled... disabled... I have downloaded stuff that one of the first of them swore I needed to make it run better... Then the next one told me to disable all that new stuff.... And still my modem laughs at me and blinks his red light and flashes the green one that is never supposed to flash and the women on the other end of this God Forsaken phone line says.. " Now we PING!"... I screamed at her that "I CANNOT PING!" I am not on-line and she says I am ... she argues that she can see me on-line and Now we Ping!... I scream for her to PING ME! I cannot PING HER!

I tell her that I have red lights and she says P-I-N-G- as if I need her to spell Ping... I am still looking at a million time restarted Moden that has a blinking light where it is supposed to be solid green and a red one where there is supposed to be no RED and she is spelling Ping to me... I ask her if this is my Box.. she says it is and informed me that I paid for it when they hookered~( as she said it!) ~me up.. I decided right then that I was going to kill my modem.. she just said it was mine and if I really paid what she said I did.. I was also going to demand a refund after I finished killing the red light blinking; won't stay on-line piece of junk! I was trying to remember where I left the hammer.... Just about that time she starts talking to me slow and loudly as if I am a moron and I loose all control and I tell her that I plan to beat the crap out of this silver box and that she can please attach a note to my account that I will be cancelling all service with them and another thing.. I have it in writing that they promised satisfaction Guaranteed... I hardly think the first ten minutes that I had their service counts as satisfaction.. I am going to be wanting my money back not to mention that I want every minute back that I have paid for and couldn't stay on-line... I was still trying to remember where the hammer was...

Blubbering to silence I took a shuddering deep breath as she said "Hold on a minute please and stay on the line"... I was scared... was it against the law to threaten a modem?.. It would be my luck that it would be.. Not to mention I was pretty sure that she knew I am insane... At that very moment the box flashed three times and all the lights became a beautiful green...I was reaching out to choke it when the Lady came back on the line and said.. I am overnighting you a new modem.. please stay calm until it arrives... I am trying really hard to stay calm until then.. I have promised not to beat this one with a hammer since they will be wanting it back as part of the warranty.. I have only cursed it a few times today.. It allowed me to do My Entre-card drops with only five restarts.. I did glance at facebook for about five seconds once today.. I read my E-mail early but since then no luck with that.. I knew Over night wouldn't really mean I'd get it today.. I figure overnight means maybe I'll get it before the end of the week... Until then I won't be posting much.. I tricked it this time into letting me post by saving and restarting and doing a million copy and pastes... It has most likely figured out that method and won't let me sneak by with that again.. and to be honest.. I am done trying to get the best of this modem.. I will be trying to remain calm until the new one arrives... and if that doesn't help.. I'll be the woman on the evening news for killing a blinking; flashing; aggravating modem... with a hammer...

Until then enjoy my "self portrait" Haiku and leave me a comment if you understand it.. or if you don't... some Haiku take a lot of thought to understand I guess... But this one is pretty simple.. Have a nice day!
Patsy

("self portrait" haiku.. a haiku that tells something about yourself.. maybe something others can not readily see..)


Betrayed

my anger flares
black as a buzzards wing~
I put on a smile

written by: Patricia sawyer
6-25-2009

A Twisted up Tuesday!

"In nature there are neither rewards nor punishments; there are consequences."

"I admit that reason is a small and feeble flame, a flickering torch by stumblers carried in the star-less night, blown and flared by passion's storm. And yet, it is the only light. Extinguish that, and nought remains."

"I would rather live with the woman I love in a world full of trouble, than to live in heaven with nobody but men."

"The true civilization is where every man gives to every other every right that he claims for himself."
~ All from Robert Green Ingersoll

Robert Green Ingersoll was born in Dresden, New York on this day in 1833. With very little schooling, he served two law apprenticeships to qualify for the bar. He put together a cavalry regiment in Illinois and led it with distinction at Shiloh, but was captured by the Confederates. He was eventually freed and returned to Illinois after taking an oath that he would not fight for the north again. He was appointed as the first Attorney General of Illinois in 1867, but he never held any other office. He was an outspoken agnostic, and even though he spoke on behalf of many Republican candidates, he was never appointed to any positions when they won. He made a dozen cross-country speaking tours, filling the largest theaters at a dollar a seat for his lectures on Shakespeare, Robert Burns, religion, politics, and the lives of famous patriots and scientists. For that time period a dollar a seat was considered a lot of money and yet people paid it to here him speak.. Many of his speeches encouraged Free thought and Humanism.. often Poking fun at organized religion. For his extreme views; the press often attacked him, but neither his views nor the negative press could stop his rising popularity. In fact, he is believed to have been seen and heard by more Americans than any other person before the advent of motion pictures and radio.

He pretty much didn't care what others thought of him.. He spoke about what he believed in and didn't care who's toes he stepped on..The people loved him but the powerful political people of that time.. had to keep him from serving in any official office..I wonder if they were afraid of his power?? He sorta reminds me of this woman I know... You might know her too.. I liked his quotes.. He shared his wisdom with a lot of people.. they say that his lectures were always spoken from memory with no notes or written scripts.. and that even though most of his speeches were at least three hours long his audience was never bored or restless.. How great to hold the attention of others for three hours at a stretch.. I wish I could do that!

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Ten Fads You just don't get!

1:)~ Tiny dogs carried in purses.. Paris Hilton was the first person I actually saw do it.. And her pup at least fit the bag.. I was in the grocery store a few weeks ago and saw a woman keep patting her bag.. Finally I saw her open the huge purse and say to the tiny dog inside.. "Lay down or I'll have to go put you in the hot truck!" The dog needed to be at home.. I walk my tiny dog on a leash.. he doesn't buy groceries or go to the Wal-mart with me.. He stays at home.. He has never been inside my purse.. He would get lost in all the junk I keep in there...He doesn't sleep hanging on the back of my chair while I have a drink in a bar.. He's a dog..enough said! :~{ !!

2:)~ Fake spray on tans.. I know you have seen those women and in a few rare cases even men who are orange~ish brown... at first I thought a friend of mine was sick turns out she was fine.. she said she had a "TAN".... They will deny with their last breath that they have a spray on tan... or maybe they are dipped I don't know.. but their tan isn't natural.. I can imagine them all lined up to be harnessed and lowered into a vat....dipped and dabbled in a weak brown staining solution...."step up and be tanned.." ~ "Come One and All.. be beautiful.." I guess with all the tanning is dangerous and causes cancer that we now hear maybe they are trying to be healthy and beautifully tanned.. Find another way.. You are orange and look icky! Please Tan a little at the time like the rest of us... Or be white... Either way I don't like you Orange~ish brown..

3:)~Bachelor and Bachelor-ette Reality Shows... OK.. Who wants to go on TV and wait and watch as the Man/Woman of your "dreams" dates; kisses; frolics; cuddles and in a lot of cases hits a home run with 50 others besides you then gives you a rose? Culling the other fools one at a time until after she/he has tried on everything the show has to offer and found every one to be lacking in some special thing.. hmmmm... Special as in one in a million? hard to find? Once in a lifetime? Can't be bought with a dozen roses? I'll pass.. Even if I wasn't married to Dave.. I'd pass... I'm the jealous type... I'd get mad... I'd take a rose and beat a bimbo who cheated by sneaking naked into the bachelor's room after the rest of us were in bed.... There was a girl on there once that I thought should get a special prize ... call it the brass canasta's prize!..... She got drunk and slipped the guy a surprise gift of her Panties the very first night when they met.. All the other girls booed and cried foul! She later said she didn't do it.. I saw her.. it was the last time I watched the show...Then she didn't show up to the rose ceremony because she was passed out.. they even showed her passed out on a bed with her green dress all wrinkled and twisted... Needless to say she didn't get a rose..

4:)~ Beauty Pageants~ I have been hating these forever.. I despise seeing tiny little girls taught to paint and priss and parade themselves for a golden cup.. Most of these are beautiful little girls with out all the paint and glitter... If Parents want their daughters... and yes there are pageants for boys too.. to be judged on what they look like then I say walk them across the stage in their own skin.. No paint.. no ruffles.. no lace and frills.. Put them on some clothes that normal kids would wear to the park.. Stick them in the sand box or on the slide and sit back and say "MAN!! what a good looking bunch of kids".. then give them all a prize of an ice cream cone.. The truth is that once your child is out there in the lime light you can't protect them from the crazies.. Believe what you like... there are crazies out there.. they go to children's pageants and to modeling try outs and to a great many of the same events our children attend... I never wanted to draw special attention to my kids.. I know a lot of people pride themselves on the status of their child in the Pageant circuit so I'll just say... this is my ten.. I don't like Pageants I think they are a danger to innocent children .. You can feel free to list me as a fad you wish would go away!

5:)~ Energy drinks~ Young Americans have made the manufacturers of these things rich.. Everyone drinks them.. well everyone except me.. I think they taste like scraps in a bucket smells... I keep scraps in a bucket and toss it to the chickens once a day.. It contains tea bags and coffee grounds and the crusts of bread from my sandwich and onion peelings and cucumber spots and the list of nastiness goes on.. chickens love it to scratch down in the ground.. I should grind it up and color it red or neon blue or apple green and sell it.. Young people please go to bed and sleep.. your young brain needs to rest and replenish.. Energy drinks are bad for your health.. Young folks stay up all night partying and playing video games then drink energy drinks to function the next day.. I have seen it with my own kids..... then before you know it their whole system is out of whack and they can't sleep.... so they have another Bull something or other energy burst in a can.. Some one even told Dave about mixing some kind of alcohol with an energy drink.. and Dave being Dave he thought maybe we'd try it.. Y'all I almost hurled..It was like cough syrup with the chicken bucket poured in too.. Nastier than anything I had ever tasted.. I to drink three shots of the alcohol alone just to get the taste out of my mouth.. :~}!!

6:)~ On-line boyfriends/girlfriends!~ This is another thing that really bothers me.. Think about it.. when you are on your computer you can be anyone at all.. I for instance am a writer.. I really do write every day.. that much is a fact.. I am however not a paid writer.. I have been paid before.. but now everyone out there is a writer so it's harder to find a job that actually pays.. Maybe one day I will be published again but in all honesty I write because I have too.. it's a part of me.. I have way too many notebooks full of stuff I wrote... Way too many more that I wish I still had.. I will write for myself and I will share it with others.. I am not rich.. I'd have to have a step ladder to reach poor... so No I can't loan you two hundred dollars.. On the other hand... not everyone is who or what they claim they are.... I get e-mails from people who read my profiles on different sights and they say they too are a writer.. do I want to meet for fun?! Maybe we can have lunch and fool around..after all we are both writers... Some don't even want a face to face meeting.. just a private chat room will do.. YUCK!! I actually know people who have met and married someone they first talked to on-line.. Sadly those don't usually work out too well.. I know I'll get comments on this and if you met and fell in love on your computer then Great!.. you are one of the Lucky few who did!! But even if you did.. you also know that unless the person can actually meet you in public and have a relationship that doesn't include hiding from their spouse.. then they are playing a cyber game.. They even have web sights that will marry you to your cyber spouse... I wonder if you have to get a cyber divorce too.. I met one of those cyber married couple once in a chat room.. he would get ticked off big time if she spoke to anyone else but him.. he used to try and get all the women there to have cyber affairs with him.. At first I thought it was funny but after a while I figured out it was sad.... She really was mentally involved with him.. when he cut his computer off he was someone Else's Husband and Baby Daddy.. she thought that one day he would leave the real world and belong to her.. I got a message from him a week or so ago.. seems he's a writer now too.. Maybe I'd meet him in a private chat.. NOT!!!

7:)~ Buck shot clothes~ I know people love to wear clothes that are torn and ripped and in some cases down right trashed.. I recently saw a pair of pants for sale that looked like plain old jeans except that they had a gazillion little tiny holes in them.. they wanted over a hundred dollars for them.. the shirt to go with them was almost sixty dollars.. they had the tee shirts in a bunch of colors.. red.. purple and green..striped.. The catch is that these clothes were shot with a gun.. Buck shot.. or so they say.. we both know they most likely didn't hang up a gazillion pairs of pants and shoot them or the shirts either.. I'm sure they had a machine to malfunction in a factory and some red neck said "damn them there looks like my grand-daddy shot them with his shot gun".. and thus began the fad of buck shot clothes.. I mean wouldn't it seem to you that anyone found in real buckshot clothes would most likely be dead or at the very least bleeding?.. Wouldn't they be a victim or in some cases the perpetrator of a crime? Why do you want to look like Grand- daddy shot you as you ran away from his watermelon patch? If you insist on having clothes with holes...bring me all your clothes and fifty dollars an outfit.. I think My brother Reuben might have a shot gun .. Dave has an old re-loader and I sure have a clothes line..we'll fix you right up and save you some money too!!

8:)~ Extremely long nails~ Why does a person need finger nails so long that their hands are useless? Are those even real? I saw a woman in the store who couldn't even use her hand.. her nails were so long that on one hand that they were all curled and twisted.. They looked like something you might see in a horror movie on the woman who was walled up in the basement..I watched in horrid fascination as she tried to pay for her goods with just the useful hand.. I know the hand worked except for the nails because she was holding a drink in it.. Those long claws twisting and twirling around the bottle.. They were painted a lime green then had roses with long and thorny stems painted on them... The nails on the other hand would barely hold a rose bud and then she had these that could have a whole rose bush painted on them.. what on earth for?? I am sorry but I wanted to take her right to the nail place and demand that they fix this mess!! Unless she was practicing for the Guinness book... and I doubt that.. then she needed a serious manicure.. Mine would never grow like that..I'd break one.. how lazy do you have to be to have three or four inch nails?... I bet she doesn't have a computer boyfriend .. she could never type fast enough to catch one!

9:)~ Neon Hair colors~ Years ago I worked at a sewing room making kids clothes, one morning the lady who sat at the sewing machine facing mine came in and wore a knitted hat all day.. It was in the middle of July and much too hot for a hat... Maria was a nice enough woman but she could get a little testy if she thought you were being nosy so I just ignored that hat.... as much as I could anyway... It didn't help that when I went to smoke at the ashtray in the corner a flock gathered around wanting to know what was up with the hat.. Finally just as the day was almost over she stood up and shouted as she ripped the hat off of her head.. "There!! are You people satisfied NOW!" Her hair was the purest shade of lime green I have ever seen.. She had been one of the first to try the Cool aid dye in her hair and had for a few years been coloring her hair with the lovely Black cherry flavored drink mix.. It suited her chocolaty skin tones and her warm brown eyes.. But alas, she had angered her usually mild mannered fifteen year old son and the night before he had sneaked into her ritual hair coloring routine and substituted Lime flavored drink mix for her normal Black cherry.. hers was an accident.. the weird colors being worn by our young people and sometimes older people too are no accident.. they pay big bucks to have their lovely locks stripped of any natural color and then dyed pink or purple or even blue..
One of my own children even had the nerve to send me a picture of himself with pink hair.. his girlfriend talked him into it.. The fit I had here in my own home was not pretty.. But to him I just said I didn't like it.. thankfully he still had his regualr color under that mess and it will grow out fast enough.. Plus his hair is long so he can get it cut when he decides pink is not his color.. Maria wore her lime hair until it grew out enough to get a trim and still have a little hair.. Can all those chemicals be good for a persons hair? I would be scared I'd shoot for purple and wind up bald.. Or worse yet, Purple and Bald...

10:)~ Skin tight clothes~ Have you ever seen a person that looks like they must have jumped off their roof and into their clothes to get them on? Or maybe that they had to grease their body and slide into the clothes.. Pants that look painful.. shirts that show rolls even you didn't know you had? I hate skin tight clothes.. Some people call the pants skinny pants.. I call them damn you need bigger pants.. Pants! .. On skinny people they make you look like a skeleton in pants and on Fat people.. well I don't want to see all those rolls pinched up like that.. suppose they bust loose? what then? You will jiggle like jello till you jiggle completely away.. Put on some clothes that fit.. you know you don't look your best in skin tight cloths.. even if you have a decent body I don't want to see it squeezed in clothes that need to be a size bigger.. Go get a size bigger clothes.. you'll breath better and I want be scared your pants will rupture..

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Happy Tuesday!
I couldn't decide what I wanted to do today.. It has been a twisted up day all around.. At 2 am my dogs began barking and howling.. I decided that while I yelled for them to shut up would be a good time to visit the potty before going back to sleep.. Time I sat down my phone went to ringing.. Now see here people... don't call me at 2am.. Not unless something is very wrong.. So I am stranded on the potty... the phone is ringing and the dogs are raising hell outside and the one inside is now yelping too... Just as I am almost able to stand the phone quits ringing and someone knocks on my window... I am now terrified.. I am sure someone is dead or dieing and I am too busy using the bathroom to have answered the phone.. It was Dave.. he was trying to sneak in after work with out waking me up.. he forgot his keys and I locked the one door that he thought he could sneak in through.. any other time that door would not have been locked... he came in and put in a movie and before even hitting play he went hard and fast asleep while I lay there awake all night long.. wondering about things that were silly.. trying to go back to sleep... hearing sounds that came from God only knows where.. getting up and down checking doors and taking the inside dog out.. and telling the outside dogs to shut up a million times.. their own sleep having been disturbed by Dave walking around the house in the pitch black of night.. and so that's how today started out twisted and has been twisted in one way or the other all day.. I hope you will enjoy today's blog.. I know it's different.. enjoy it anyway! Feel free to leave me a comment.. even a twisted up one will be fine! It will match with the rest of my day! Have a great day!
Patsy